The Week in ‘Wives: A RHONJ pool party, RHOD snake party, and RHOA wedding
The best, worst, and wildest moments from this week on The Real Housewives.
What a journey we took this week, my fellow Bravoholics! We may still be stuck in the last gasps of quarantine (shout-out to the vax!) but the problem-solving Housewives took us all around the world in their own creative ways, starting with The Real Housewives of Atlanta's trip to Nice, spelled Niece and decorated like Party City Paris. It's fine! France is France, even when it's Georgia! Next up, the Real Housewives of Dallas broke out their best caftans for a normal Texan meditation ritual in D'Andra's living room, followed by their best sparkly caftans for Tiffany's birthday in a balloon-filled backyard "Morocco." Finally, we finished off the week with The Real Housewives of New Jersey, who just stayed put in New Jersey (if it ain't broke, etc.). Here are our picks for the best, worst, and wildest moments from this week in 'wives!
HIGH POINT: 10.10.20, RHOA
The ladies have been talking about Cynthia's wedding all season, and Atlanta fans, we finally made it! Made it to 10/10/2020, that is, not to the actual wedding: Bravo cameras couldn't go in due to COVID protocols, and the event couldn't be held outside due to a raging hurricane. But even with uncooperative weather on the long list of things that went wrong in the days leading up to the long-awaited ceremony, Cynthia still got her dream wedding to Mike, who is shaping up to be a great Real Househusband. And we still got glimpses via home video — of the happy couple almost kissing too soon, of some Bolo-centric dance floor gossip, of Kandi wearing strands of pearls in her ponytail, which I loved. We can pick back up again with the usual dramas next week, but for now, cheers to the newlyweds!
LOW POINT: Jennifer under pressure, RHONJ
Jennifer is a wild card to me. Sometimes I like her a lot, and then something like last season's reunion happens. I felt deeply for her this week, though, as the tension between her recently estranged parents heated up over a planned trip to Turkey to visit their grandson (whom Jennifer's mother refuses to call by his given name, which is also her husband's). Jennifer, of course, loves both of her parents and seems to be trying to help the situation by having her father stay in her house, but that move did put her very much in the middle of the conflict. So who can blame her for enjoying a few (dozen) shots at Teresa's pool party? I just hope that her hangover isn't too bad — or that her taste for tequila doesn't become the subject of cast-wide concern, as Margaret's confessionals suggest it might.
WILDEST MOMENT: Tiffany takes the cake, RHOD
Tiffany's birthday party took us to Morocco and then on an emotional roller coaster. First, she gave a heartfelt toast about how happy she is to have a group of girlfriends, followed up by Mama Dee's speech encouraging young ladies everywhere to never let anyone tell them they can't achieve their gold-digging dreams. Brandi once again tried to ruin a perfectly good night, this time by spewing some crap at D'Andra about how Jesus doesn't love shamans, I guess. Luckily, that was cut short by the introduction of some actual snakes to the party, including Kameron's new BFF, at whom she lovingly cooed "you're not a show snake, you're a beautiful supermodel snake," which I plan to say to myself in the mirror every morning from now on. Next, D'Andra got drunk and got raunchy, prompting her mother to declare everyone "a bunch of nuts" and then casually, viciously shade D'Andra by saying she took her stepfather's name as an act of calculated social climbing. Looks like the real snake was sitting right there at the table all along.
👑 QUEEN OF THE WEEK 👑 Cynthia, RHOA
SENDING LOVE AND ICE CREAM: To RHONY's Tinsley, now single.
DYNAMIC DUO: Loved the friendly exes energy between RHONJ's Teresa and Juicy Joe Giudice, telling her she looks "alright for an old lady" in her thong via FaceTime!
THE HORROR: Flashbacks to Cynthia's first RHOA wedding were deeply upsetting for many reasons, not the least of which being a brutal reminder of 2010 eyebrow trends.
STEALTH MVP: Kameron quietly carried this whole episode of RHOD from top to bottom, but my favorite moment had to be when she revealed that she used to bring stacks of Vogues to keep herself entertained whenever Court took her to Cowboys games. Chic! Relatable!
FLAVOR OF THE WEEK: Pineapple. (RHONJ)
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