Lindsey Morgan says Walker exit was 'one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make'
Warning: This post contains spoilers from the Dec. 9 episode of Walker.
Micki Ramirez (Lindsey Morgan) has handed in her badge.
Following the news of Lindsey Morgan's exit from the series, Walker wrapped up Micki's story with its season 2 mid-season finale. After struggling with what happened while she was undercover, Micki made the decision to turn in her badge and gun and return home to San Antonio to re-evaluate her priorities. That meant saying goodbye to her partner, Walker (Jared Padalecki), her boss, Captain James (Coby Bell), and breaking up with Trey (Jeff Pierre).
EW spoke to Morgan about her exit and whether she'd be open to a return.
ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: What was your reaction to finding out how Micki would say goodbye?
LINDSEY MORGAN: The whole process was a bit surreal, and I didn't really quite know how it was going to happen. That final scene was not in the original script. So [showrunner] Anna [Fricke] had added that scene during the week of shooting, and when I received it, it just gutted me. And I believe I texted her, "Are you trying to kill me?" It was just almost too much. You know what's funny is the way I work is if I can't quite figure out a scene, for some reason, I have trouble memorizing it, and I could not get that scene memorized until probably 10 minutes before we shot it. And I realize now I was trying to protect myself from really feeling those emotions and really feeling the gravity of it all for Micki and for Lindsey. And then finally I just surrendered and I was like, "You know what? Let me just feel all these feelings," and it hit me like a tsunami.
It was just so poetic because that was the last scene we shot of that episode and unbeknownst to me the entire cast had come back for that last scene and were watching in video village. So it was just this magical moment of being completely supported and nurtured by such a wonderful group of people. It just was a really special moment for me.
We also have to talk about Micki's ending with Trey, which was maybe the most mature breakup I've ever watched?
They're much better humans than I am, that's for sure. But I love that scene because you see there's so much respect and love between these two, and even though they break up, it wasn't a fight. It was almost like they have different understandings [of] who they are as [individuals] and who they are as a relationship. And the thing is that Micki's changing. What Micki wants is changing, and I think that's really human and also really hard. It's really hard to go to someone you made a commitment to and say, "Hey, I'm not sure if I want this anymore," and it's also really hard to just say, "Hey, I'm confused." And I think that's really honest and I love that our writers allowed those two characters to explore the gray area of relationships, especially in these extenuating circumstances of law enforcement. These people in law enforcement experience so much trauma. It's about what that does to someone's psyche, and also what that does to someone's home life and relationships.
But I also love that they never said it. Trey and Micki never said, "I guess we should break up," or "I guess it's over. I guess it's done." It was just this acknowledgment that I'm in a different place now and I need to go find myself. And he loves her so much and respects her, he let her do that. I believe, and I hope there's still a chance for Micki and Trey in the future. My fingers are crossed for that.
Well, that's probably the answer to this question, but if the opportunity presents itself would you be willing to revisit this character in the future?
One-hundred percent. No questions asked. Me leaving was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make in my life and it's really interesting because my life can parallel Micki's a lot, and this was kind of a similar instance. I really need to take the time to take care of myself and my well-being physically and emotionally and mentally, and reevaluate how I got to where I am and make some changes. My life had been so much about my career, I had not cared for myself enough during my 20s. All of that work and running and ambition, it caught up to me and now I'm facing a lot of burnout.
That's something that I need to really heal for me, and also I want to start a family soon. So I really need my body and myself to be in the best possible place it can be. I had to take a really long and hard look at my life. And I think that's exactly what Micki's doing now too. And I think that is something we're finally talking about. I'm so thankful to Simone Biles because she made such a difficult decision on such a grand global scale, that she needed to focus on herself, and if the pandemic had taught me one thing it was that our health is the most important thing we have and we need to prioritize that in any which way we can and it's our responsibility to take care of ourselves.
You all are continuing that conversation as well by putting a story like Micki's on television.
Yes. I feel like we don't explore that story enough. We don't explore the priority shifting enough in honest and even subtle ways. I think so many of us face a changing of priorities. Anna told me that my big arc for season 2 was Micki exploring, "Who am I now? Who am I now after these experiences, and why do I do what I do?" It's really examining the choices we make and the personas we create and the stories we tell ourselves. And so I love that we got to delve into that a bit because it takes a really special person to be in law enforcement, in my opinion. You're putting your life on the line. You're making these daily sacrifices. You have to be beyond brave.
It felt like it made sense for her journey. When we first met her she talked about how she had to kill herself to get to this point in her career.
Yes. And a big question Micki was exploring is why? Why does she feel the need to do this? Why does she feel the need to constantly prove herself? Why does she feel like she has to kill herself over and over to gain respect? I feel like that paralleled some of my life. It's why do I do what I do? Why do I feel like I need to constantly be doing new projects or working and never giving myself a break? And the more I explored it, it's about missing some validation in our lives that we need to give to ourselves and stop looking at from external places. So I love getting to explore that with Micki and with myself.
Walker airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on the CW.
This interview has been edited and condensed for length and clarity.
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