By Lynette Rice
October 12, 2020 at 10:25 PM EDT
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Like I’m sure! An '80s theme doesn’t necessarily lend itself to the perfect cha cha, but any reason to bring New Kids on the Block and Doc Brown’s DeLorean onto Dancing With the Stars, right? Let’s get tubular!

Jesse Metcalfe and Sharna Burgess: Apparently, the actor didn’t always have his great looks to rely on; he said he wasn’t popular in high school! So he wanted to show “America who I really am.” Only on DWTS can someone do that by performing a tango to Tears for Fears! “You lost your timing,” admitted Bruno Tonioli. “It went a bit wrong. I am sorry but we are halfway through.” “I definitely thought you were much more confident,” added Carrie Ann Inaba. “I saw you feeling the music for the first time.” Score: 19 out of 30

Chrishell Stause and Gleb Savchenko: I had a hard time taking my eyes off Gleb’s boffo mullet; I barely recognized him! Maybe my eyes just drifted to his coiffure since there wasn’t a lot of cha cha to enjoy. And it’s not good when even the Zoom cameos from the New Kids on the Block upstage your number. (But seriously, how cute is Joey McIntyre STILL.) “I didn’t feel like you had enough content,” said Inaba. Added Derek Hough, “I still want to see you close your feet, you have to close those ankles, so important." Score: 19 out of 30

Vernon Davis and Peta Murgatroyd: Peta earned every bit of her salary Monday by trying to teach the tango to her tiger. Livin’ on a prayer, indeed. Poor Vernon; he won’t last much longer. “It started so well. What happened is you went wrong. There was a link, you went to the wrong foot. Somehow your footwork started to get flat,” said Tonioli. “Work on your feet.” Then Tonioli reacted to the booing crowd — which actually wasn’t there. Ah, DWTS in the time of COVID. Score: 21 out of 30

Jeannie Mai and Brandon Armstrong: I didn’t get the bathtub and how it ties to virginity. But I liked how the cotton doubled as bubbles! Speaking of heavy lather, Jeannie’s frothy personality made her jazz performance to Madonna’s tune a real delight. (You’re feeling like she’ll make the final three, right?) "Y’all looked absolutely adorable,” said Hough. “There is a confidence about you when you dance, it brings an energy and an ease. It was a simple and clean routine.” (Aside: I love how Brandon picks up Jeannie and rushes her off the stage when they are saved at the end of the night). Score: 24 out of 30

Nelly and Daniella Karagach: It takes a very big man to admit to loving Porky’s. It also takes a very special Grammy winner to make a samba look good in gold chains and a sleeveless denim jacket. Nelly deserved at least one 9 for that rad performance, but the bachelorette hogged them all on Monday. Gag me with a spoon, judges! “Nelly, as Len Goodman would say, 'hold my gaze.' That was your best dance!” said Hough. “Dude there was a freedom to you tonight.” Score: 24 out of 30

Justina Machado and Sasha Farber: Big night for the One Day at a Time actress: reruns of her comedy that got its start on Pop are debuting Monday on CBS, and she got to open DWTS with a jazz performance to Flashdance’s “Maniac.” She seemed a little off the beat —' hey, it’s hard to keep up with that speedy gremlin of a partner. Fortunately, the judges were enamored with her splashy finish. “What a great way to open the show!” said Hough. “You are always so much fun to watch.” “This was so deliciously '80s. I was crying all the way through, for a good reason,” adds Tonioli. Score: 24 out of 30 

A.J. McLean and Cheryl Burke: I needed the camera to focus a little longer on mini-A.J. in that red, low-necked bodysuit during the rehearsal package. What was that moment in time about, big guy? Sadly, we didn’t get an answer before he waltzed to “Open Arms” at the DWTS homecoming dance. Terrific staging, production people. “This is the perfect place where you should be this week,” said Inaba. “I love this style on you,” said Hough. “You had great control with your feet which created smoothness across the floor.” Score: 24 out of 30

Skai Jackson and Alan Bersten: The Disney star lost me after she bragged how she was born in 2002. Fortunately, her mom brought me back by saying, “Don’t disappoint the ‘80s!” Skai didn’t. “That was so fun,” said Hough. “When you are side by side, you light up.” Added Inaba, “You have moments of greatness.” Score: 24 out of 30

Monica Aldama and Val Chmerkovskiy: Tonight, we learned about how the cheerleading coach from Navarro College had originally planned a career on Wall Street. For some reason, she found more of a future in tumbling and high Vs. Go figure! Anyway, what did you think of her tango to “Tainted Love,” judges? “You were so on it,” said Tonioli. “You brought out the guns, the legs, she looks amazing!” said Inaba. “I’m so proud of you.” Score: 26 out of 30

Nev Schulman and Jenna Johnson: Catfish man doesn't really look like a dancer — until he gets under that mirrored ball. Man, can he quickstep! "You are one of the most consistent dancers we have seen," said Inaba. "Just a few times it felt like your movements were a little smaller than normal. It didn't feel like you were solid on your feet." "Dude, great job, great way to end the night! Loved it," said Hough. More from Tonioli: "It was very fast and very, very efficient." Score: 26 out of 30

Kaitlyn Bristowe and Artem Chigvintsev:  Must be nice to be introduced by host Tyra Banks as the highest-scoring couple of the season! But look, it’s true: another Bachelorette is rocking the ballroom and looking like a sure bet for finale week. Has Artem finally been blessed with a partner that will bring him his first Mirrorball Trophy? Looks like it. “This is the fourth tango we saw tonight. In frame, you are far superior to anyone else’s frame,” said Inaba. “You nailed it.”  Score: 27 out of 30

Johnny Weir and Britt Stewart: Brava to the producers for giving the figure skater the first contemporary dance of the season. His modern moves to Bonnie Tyler’s “Total Eclipse of the Heart” earned the season’s first 10s. “Connecting, projecting, emoting,” said Tonioli. “What you are doing now is the sign of the artist. You really give dance a meaning. We always know you have great extension. You can feel the space, not just with the moves but with the emotion.” Score: 29 out of 30

Vernon and Peta and Jesse and Sharna were in the final two. Tonioli and Inaba saved Vernon and Peta so the Desperate Housewives actor had to go. Argue amongst yourselves whether this was the right call.

Hough will dance next week! See you then, glitter admirers.

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Episode Recaps

Dancing With the Stars

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