AHS: Cult Teaser Is Filled With Clowns, Grocery Stores, and Cheyenne Jackson
It's Election Night...
Ally (Sarah Paulson) is none too pleased when Trump is announced the new president at the beginning of the teaser trailer for the new season of American Horror Story: Cult (watch it here). But check out those nice window treatments!
Ally's son is like, 'WTF, Mom?' But look at those cabinets!
Kai (Evan Peters) gets soooo excited by Trump's win that he starts dry humping the television.
Ally visits her therapist (Cheyenne Jackson) to discuss her coulrophobia or fear of clowns. Since the election, her clown sightings have gone waaaay up.
Ivy (Alison Pill) attempts to comfort her clown-seeing wife.
Ally thinks she sees someone — prob a dude with a red nose and big floppy shoes — in their restaurant. This is probably the place called The Butchery, seen in paparazzi photos.
Winter (Billie Lourd) and Kai pinky swear on something and I'm guessing it's not to stay virgins. He asks her what fills her heart with dread and she says, "Children." Cut to...
Winter gets hired as the nanny for Ivy and Ally! Horror is notorious for evil caregivers from Hand That Rocks the Cradle to The Omen. But I'm digging Winter's Wednesday Addams look.
Oh, hello, old friend. Clearly, Winter is trying to encourage Ally's paranoia with her gift of a Twisty the Clown action figure to their son. Also, who knew Twisty had become such a star!
The clowns, who are likely part of Kai's cult, start terrorizing Ally and Ivy.
And they have even creepier modes of transportation: Ice cream trucks!! But look how cute this neighborhood is!!! Very Halloween meets Scream in terms of property value.
Some of the cult clowns hit a neighborhood house which might be Ally and Ivy's. This one has a weird hairline. BOO!
This one is either about to kill/torture somebody or is testing those drapes for fabric consistency.
Ally also spots some super creepy clown/children/ladies in one of the security mirrors. Maybe this place has super good deals, though?
Since it's American Horror Story, even a trip to the grocery store isn't safe. While Ally's picking up some snacks, a clown on a scooter rides down an aisle.
Things will not turn out well for this lady. Just guessin'.
Ally arms herself and warns her son to not let go of her hand when she opens the door. THE CLOWNS ARE EVERYWHERE!
Kai chose a hair color that blends well with earth tones. Oh and he's also running a real scary cult.
AHS: Cult kicks off Sept. 5 on FX.