By Dalton Ross
February 13, 2019 at 10:52 PM EST
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SPOILER ALERT: Read on only if you have already watched the season 2 finale of Celebrity Big Brother.

Surprise! Anthony Scaramucci actually WAS a contestant on Celebrity Big Brother this whole time, swooping in at the finale to be anointed the winner even though he had not been in the house for weeks. Okay, not really. But would that have been any less absurd than anything else that happens in the Celebrity Big Brother house?

In actuality, reality television crown jewel Tamar Braxton was crowned the season 2 winner, defeating former Heisman winner and NFL star Ricky Williams in a jury vote to win the (coveted?) title as well as the $250,000 prize that comes with it.

Ricky won the first Head of Household competition of the evening, which had contestants flying through the air to complete a magnetized puzzle. He then nominated Kandi Burress and Dina Lohan for eviction. After Lolo Jones won the laser-museum-heist veto competition (and yes, that is something that happened and I just wrote), Kandi was voted out by the Ricky’s tie-breaking vote.

Speaking of tiebreakers, Ricky then beat Tamar in one to win the final HOH of the season and guarantee his spot in the final two. He chose Tamar to sit next to him at the end, sending a clearly perturbed Lolo and clearly delighted Dina out of the house.

It proved to be the wrong decision, as Tamar ended up getting all nine jury votes to win unanimously, leaving Ricky with the $50,000 runner-up prize.

We’ll have interviews with the final 2 up later along with our finale recap. Until then, you’ll just have to entertain yourself by watching Tom Green get totally left hanging on a high-to-low five attempt.

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