Samantha Bee recovers from 'heartbreaking' Brett Kavanaugh hearings with confetti cake
Thursday, the day Dr. Christine Blasey Ford was questioned before the Senate Judiciary Committee over allegations of sexual assault against Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh, was “one of the most heartbreaking experiences” Samantha Bee endured since hosting Full Frontal. So the late-night comedian decided to cope by eating confetti cake and then throwing it at a cardboard cutout of Republican Senator Lindsey Graham.
“It’s Friday, Sep. 28, and I don’t have a show tonight, but yesterday a bunch of super-powerful white dudes stood up and yelled at rape survivors for messing up their schedules so I needed to either yell into a camera or eat an entire confetti cake. Honestly, I choose both,” Bee said in a video posted online.
She then slammed the “shriveled old scrotums” who “went on TV and basically told the world that any Ivy League chode’s career ambitions are worth more than all the women he may have hurt on his way there.” That includes Graham, who threw a “hissy fit,” and Arizona Senator Jeff Flake, who was confronted by sexual assault survivors after he said he would vote for Kavanaugh.
“I know it’s never good when the fate of the nation hangs on Jeff Flake actually doing a thing,” Bee quipped. “He’s a real Atticus Finch [from To Kill a Mockingbird] if Atticus Finch had gone right into court and said, ‘I may be a little concerned about the treatment of black people. Anyway, bye!'”
Despite the frustration, Bee, sprawled out on a couch with confetti cake, has her coping mechanisms. She appreciates “the exquisite rage contouring on Alyssa Milano’s face” — the Charmed star attended the hearings with a sign that read “I Believe Survivors, No On Kavanaugh” — “meeting new dogs,” and her “life-size cardboard cutout of Lindsey Graham.”
Cue Bee hurling confetti cake at said cutout.
During the week, other late-night hosts, like Stephen Colbert and Jimmy Kimmel, dug deep with their zingers into the Kavanaugh hearings. But Bee ended her brief video by predicting a repeat of what happened after Anita Hill’s 1991 testimony against Clarence Thomas for sexual harassment: “an unprecedented number of women were swept into office, thanks to a massive wave of female rage.”
“We’re going to do that again in November,” she continued, referencing the midterm elections. “And then maybe we’ll power the eastern seaboard for a while. Pretty sure we’ll have some rage left over.”