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August 07, 2018 at 09:29 AM EDT

Do you want to look like “the dead girl in Goldfinger,” “a bike reflector,” or perhaps “C-3PO crossed with a glazed ham”? That’s how Stephen Colbert referred to President Trump‘s look at one of his recent rallys — and he’s got you covered.

Colbert debuted his Trump-inspired makeup tutorial on The Late Show Monday night to show everyone how to get “the hottest, most presidential highlights.” Trump has been campaigning across the country ahead of the midterm elections this fall, and the late-night personality was drawn to Trump’s complexion at a stop in Ohio.

Getting that “golf to rally” look requires a healthy amount of bronzer, highlighter or “crushed up Christmas ornaments,” and then fat from bologna to blend it all together.

Some helpful tips: Definitely use protective goggles (the tighter the better), “don’t be afraid to define your upper lip,” and “a lot of it goes a very long way.”

Follow those steps and you’ll be “rally ready.”

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