Teen Mom OG's Catelynn Baltierra suffers a miscarriage: 'I miss my baby'
Catelynn Baltierra tried to cope after suffering a miscarriage on Monday night’s episode of Teen Mom OG.
Her husband, Tyler Baltierra, confirmed the sad news to MTV producer Kerthy, who asked him if he thought Catelynn had suffered a miscarriage.
“Yeah,” he said. “It’s very traumatic. When you see her shaking and she’s got blood everywhere, it’s like … you don’t really know what to do.”
“What did you do?” Kerthy asked.
“She kind of cleaned herself up, and we kind of figured out what was going on,” Tyler said. “Spotting is normal, but all the clotting is not. So we just saw on the bed and cried. We just held each other. There’s nothing you can really do.”
He described the moment as being similar to placing their 8-year-old daughter Carly for adoption.
“Carly is a little different because we get to see her every year,” he said. “But it’s a loss, and you feel it, like, you process it as a loss. I guess it’s something I didn’t really understand before. It’s crazy.”
After Catelynn’s doctor confirmed she had suffered a miscarriage, she told Kerthy in her car that she felt the incident was a sign “it wasn’t the right time” to have children.
“Thank God for kids and husbands,” she added.
“They got you out of bed?” Kerthy asked.
At this question, Catelynn admitted she wouldn’t know what to do with herself if it weren’t for her family.
“If they weren’t around I probably would’ve offed myself. Seriously. I’m sure a lot of people can relate,” Catelynn said. “It’s like I don’t want to live another day like this.”
When Tyler called her, he tried his best to lift her mood, saying, “You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met in my life.”
“Well, you’d be super proud of me today, because I have anxiety and I’m working through it,” she told him. “I walked outside and kept telling myself, ‘You’re beautiful, you’re smart, you’re strong.’”
While Catelynn seemed to be doing her best to combat her depression, Kerthy approached Tyler later about something Catelynn had told her.
“So, I texted you guys to come to yoga this morning. And she wasn’t up …” Kerthy said, letting Tyler explain that his wife had been attempting to focus on her mindset with breathing exercises and affirmations.
“When we got out [of yoga], she called my phone, and when we started talking to her, she said she wanted to kill herself,” Kerthy told Tyler.
He began to cry, shoulders heaving as he said, “I can’t even talk.”
“When she says stuff like that, it’s crazy,” he continued. “When you love someone like that and they say that … I’d literally die …”
Kerthy attempted to console Tyler, hugging him and saying, “But it’s amazing you were able to find a treatment facility so quickly because when someone says they want to kill themselves you don’t f— around. And you found a place in Tucson.”
“What’re you guys doing with Nova? Who’s picking her up,” she asked.
“Cate’s mom. She’s going to keep asking, though,” he said, referring to the couple’s 3-year-old daughter Nova crying out for her mother.
“I really wanted that baby,” he added, crying. “Life’s just not giving me a break right now.”
As Catelynn prepared to leave for treatment in Arizona, she hugged Kerthy and said, “I miss my baby.”
Later on, in the car heading toward the airport, she called Tyler’s mom, Kim, to tell her she was leaving for treatment.
“I contemplated every single way that I could kill myself today,” she said, crying.
“Honey, you’re a great mother, you’re a great wife,” Kim said. “And we’re going to be praying for you every day. How long are you going for, do you know?”
“As of right now, 30 days,” Catelynn answered.
“I’m really happy that you’re going to get help,” Kim said. “You got this.”
MTV cameras were not allowed to film inside of Catelynn’s treatment center. When Tyler returned to his car after dropping her off in Tucson, Arizona, he broke down in his car, sobbing.
The couple has openly discussed the possibility of having another baby on-camera after Tyler expressed his desire to expand their family.
Despite his hope for more children, Catelynn — who struggled with postpartum depression after the birth of Nova — openly expressed her fears. “It’s a daily fight in my mind to not be afraid of postpartum [depression],” she told Tyler in a recent episode. “I can’t let my mind stop me from one of the most amazing things ever.”
In mid-January, Catelynn returned to rehab to overcome childhood trauma, and last week, Tyler had plenty of loving words for his wife as he visited her.
The Teen Mom OG star, 26, shared a photo of himself and his wife on Instagram with a caption supporting his 25-year-old partner.
“Seeing this gorgeous woman & all the work she has done has given me such hope, a feeling of peace, and unconditional love that is hard to explain with words,” he wrote. “It was a very emotionally intense Family Week Program, but I know that our love & commitment towards each other will persevere through anything this life throws our way.”
Tyler continued, “I’m so proud of you Babe & I can’t wait until you finally come home so I can just hug you & hold you for as long as I want. You are worthy…You are strong…You are beautiful…You are loved! #MyBabe #Soulmate #MyWife.”
Teen Mom OG airs Mondays (9 p.m. ET) on MTV.
This article originally appeared on People.com