By Ariana Bacle
July 11, 2017 at 01:12 PM EDT
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Big Bang Theory star Melissa Rauch announced her pregnancy in a powerful essay for Glamour, where Rauch also shared details of her previous miscarriage and its accompanying emotional impact.

Rauch, who is expecting her first child with husband, Winston, opened the piece with “the only statement regarding my pregnancy that doesn’t make me feel like a complete fraud,” which is, “Melissa is expecting her first child. She is extremely overjoyed, but if she’s being honest, due to the fact that she had a miscarriage the last time she was pregnant, she’s pretty much terrified at the moment that it will happen again. She feels weird even announcing this at all, and would rather wait until her child heads off to college to tell anyone, but she figures she should probably share this news before someone sees her waddling around with her mid-section protruding and announces it first.”

She goes on to point out the blame the term “miscarriage” places on women — “F that so hard, right in its patriarchal nut-sack,” she says — and explains the loss of her baby “was one of the most profound sorrows I have ever felt in my life.”

“What I realized, though, is that because this kind of loss is not openly talked about nearly as much as it should be, there really is no template for how to process these emotions,” she writes. “You’re not necessarily going to a funeral or taking time off from work to mourn, but that doesn’t change the fact that something precious has been unexpectedly taken from your life.”

After detailing the guilt and depression she’s felt and expressing how grateful she is for her current pregnancy, Rauch specifically addresses other women in similar situations. “So, to all the women out there who are dealing with fertility issues, have gone through a miscarriage or are going through the pain of it currently, allow me to leave you with this message: You are not alone. And, it is perfectly OK to not be OK right now.”

Read her full essay here.

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