SPOILER ALERT: Read on if you have already watched the season finale of The New Celebrity Apprentice.
A winner has finally been crowned and hired for a job that does not actually exist! That’s right, Arnold Schwarzenegger super-fan Matt Iseman was selected as the champion of The New Celebrity Apprentice by none other than Arnold Schwarzenegger himself. The American Ninja Warrior host beat out 1980s pop superstar and oversized hat enthusiast Boy George in a tense finale that featured baby kangaroos, ice sculptures, and lots of dancing Carnival Cruise Lines executives getting funky with their bad selves. It also featured the following exchange:
CARSON KRESSLEY: “I think a lot of people have arthritis.”
BOY GEORGE: “Is that bad or good for us?”
The stars all came out for the finale presentation — Natasha Bedingfield, Scary Spice, Caitlyn Jenner, the other two-thirds of Wilson Phillips — and the stars all aligned for Matt Iseman, who was able to raise an incredible $573, 329 for the Arthritis Foundation, beating Boy George’s also impressive $445,925, even though he lacked the celebrity Rolodex of his more-famous castmates. (Sidenote: Does anyone actually use Rolodexes anymore?)
However, Boy George had Arnold Schwarzenegger literally dancing in the aisle during his presentation — which some may argue should have handed the musician the victory right there just for providing that positively delicious visual. It set up a final Boardroom decision for the Governator, and, in the end, he awarded the title (and $250,000 charitable donation that went with it) to Iseman.
Make sure to read my full recap for a deeper dive into all the necessary nonsense, and feel free to weigh in below whether you think the right person won.