Millennial Print launches; Kelsey commits the cardinal sin of reading the comments
We’re like Steve Jobs in the garage phase of our career. We are Oprah in Baltimore.
Overstatement? Perhaps. But you can hardly blame Kelsey for her enthusiasm after being promoted to editor-in-chief of her very own publishing imprint. And why shouldn’t she be optimistic? It’s an unbelievable opportunity (literally) for the 26-year-old and her faux-millennial partner-in-crime. Unfortunately for Liza, though, this means just another more missed opportunity to reveal her secret to Kelsey.
“Babe, you’re not a millennial,” Josh helpfully points out when he hears the news.
“Yeah, well, Dr. Dre is not a doctor,” she replies. (Good point!)
Josh remains unconvinced though — he wants to live an authentic life and Liza’s scheme just doesn’t jibe. So he tells Liza he needs some time to wrap his head around it. Again. Are we going to have to hit this beat every episode? Here’s hoping Josh makes a decision about Liza and sticks to it.
Meanwhile, arrangements for the Millennial Print launch party are in full swing. The Fat Jew, Man Repeller, and the guy who discovered Pizza Rat have all been invited, and Lauren has set up Kelsey and Liza with fittings at the painfully chic Hector and Dorff. The designers have a vision for Kelsey’s boss girl look: “Here I am, but I’m busy. Look at me, but don’t.” All that’s left to do is send out the press release announcing Kelsey’s new position…
…And because the internet can be just awful sometimes (no offense), you can probably guess what the reactions are to a young female upstart being appointed to a high-profile position. Yes, Gawker comments run the gamut from “Who’s she screwing now?!” to a picture of a kitten in a Barbie car. Kelsey’s crushed, and her confidence is hardly bolstered when her custom-made dress from Hector and Dorff arrives and it makes her look like a bit player from Jurassic Park. (I’ve provided a handy side-by-side comparison below.)
Despite her misgivings, Kelsey wears the frock to the party. And amidst all the insults, she does receive a very nice tweet from Mother of Media Millennials Lena Dunham. But it’s not enough to squelch her anxiety, and she starts to hyperventilate. She retreats to the kitchen and lies down on the dirty floor in her designer dress. Unable to locate the zipper, Liza ends up cutting her out of her dress. (The whole scene reminded me a bit of this season 4 moment from Sex and the City…)
“Liza, I feel like such an impostor,” Kelsey confides from the floor.
“So do I, every single day,” Liza assures her. (Truer words…)
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With Liza’s fake-it-til-you-make-it pep talk still ringing in her ears, Kelsey pulls herself up in just her amazing slip and takes the stage to deliver her speech. Except, she wrote the text on her palm and it’s now all smeared! Not to worry — Liza gives Kelsey her Bluetooth so she can feed her lines like some hipster Cyrano de Bergerac. And the ploy doesn’t pass Charles’ keen gaze. He offers Liza his compliments on the speech — right before asking where her young man is. When she says she’s not sure there is a young man anymore, he heads off to secure a couple of glasses of champagne.
Cue Josh — fresh off stumbling into Maggie’s weird sex party where she tells him to accept Liza for who she is — who arrives at the party to support his girlfriend. Just in time to make things awkward with Charles. The boss man hands the couple the two glasses and leaves them to it. Is Josh finally all in? I guess we’ll have to wait and see…