One of the Top 4 heads home; Nicole Scherzinger growls and it ain't pretty

By Annie Barrett
Updated August 03, 2020 at 06:23 PM EDT
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After a Thursday results show featuring a billion recap segments, Florence and the Machine, and Nicole Scherzinger making dirrrrrrrrrty love to the microphone in a rugged new style of burlesque, the act eliminated from the X Factor laser field on December 15 was….

Marcus Canty.

At least he got to wear his jammie pants on TV!

“Why you lookin’ sad, Steve?” Marcus wondered. “Because I like you and I don’t want you to go!” Mr. Jones said emphatically. This was SO CUTE and a lot more natural than coach L.A.’s “I’d be lying if I didn’t say I’m a little sad.” Not that it’s a contest. (Steve Jones wins!)

Marcus accepted his fate readily and I fell in love with him a little bit as he kept shifting gears with his little dance moves in the corner of the screen during the clip show of all his different sparklemonster performances throughout the season. The boy’s no Usher or Bobby Brown, no matter how much the judges wanted us to believe that. But he’s a good kid and a great performer. Maybe L.A. Reid can fly him up to the Hamptons every so often to mow his five million acres of lawn.

Josh Krajcik had to hang around with Marcus in what was NOT NECESSARILY the bottom two and seemed as unfazed about it as he has about anything that has ever happened on this show. You could set a Josh-sized pile of enchiladas on fire right next to him and he’d just smile serenely, look off to the right, and slowly rub his hands together in mild approval of humanity’s collective fate. All right, that’s great, let’s go with it.

Nicole Scherzinger sang “Pretty,” a new single off her several-times-delayed album Killer Love, which has still not been released in the U.S. I always enjoy being reminded of the Blue Man Group, so this was great! Both the Smoke Monster and a series of hot beefy drummers with purple glowsticks competed with Nicole’s fringed singing gloves and scrap metal landfill of a necklace. She don’t wanna be pretty no more! It must hurt to lie, because girl seemed to be in pain (along with anger and fear — the vocalist’s trifecta) the whole time.

NEXT: You are the ultimate rainbow! I loved Simon’s attempt to imitate Nicole’s judging style: “I believe in you. You believe in me. You transcend the universe. God is smiling on you. Life is a waterfall, and you are the ultimate rainbow.” This is the best compliment in history.

That Florence and the Machine number was like a So You Think You Can Dance fever dream with all the stained glass-patterned GIANT SCREENS, colorful flash bulbs, and sweeping search lights to accompany the backup contemporary dancers in gauzy gowns. I always love Florence’s voice even if I’m never really sure what she’s saying. My hair’s so reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed, probably. I’m playing her latest album right now, actually. Should I switch to Nicole’s? Psych!

Can you believe all of the Top 4’s friends and family members love to drink Pepsi during the show? Webcams never lie. What are the chances?!

All in all, a predictable results show. My favorite moment was definitely when Paula wandered off during Stevecrest’s hot mess of a satellite interview — all the way from onstage to backstage. Poor Steve! Nobody’s listening!

“IT’S TIME. TO GET. SERIOUS.” Happy with tonight’s results show, Ameriker?

Your final three are Josh Krajcik, Melanie Amaro, and Chris Rene.

Who will win the spectacle that is The X Factor?

Read more:

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Simon Cowell, Demi Lovato, Kelly Rowland, and Paulina Rubio judge Season 3.
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