On ''Weeds,'' Doug gets his revenge on Celia and Sullivan by sabotaging the Majestic pipeline; meanwhile, Nancy and Valerie make friends, and Dean is laid up
Credit: Randy Tepper

”Weeds”: Doug gets his revenge on Celia

We learned a lot of things this installment: that would-be mortal enemies Nancy and Valerie can become unlikely amigas; that Celia, thoroughly under Sullivan’s spell, will never truly break free of Dean (and vice versa); and that the terrifically puerile rivalry between Doug and Sullivan will just keep escalating. Juicy insights, right? So why do I feel the doldrums?

Last week’s uncomfortable mammogram led to both of Peter’s exes becoming (forgive me) bosom buddies. Yes, easygoing Nancy and cranky Valerie seem to have a lot in common — kids, stalking, that sketch of Val (sorta), long hair?.And that’s pretty much it. How long until this very bad alliance will interfere with Nancy’s amped-up business ventures? She’s pretty much got a full-scale operation going now. Sanjay is back dealing on campuses — and gay clubs! Good to see the kid embracing his vie en rose, with T-shirt to match. (Wonder when Clinique’s little bundle of embryonic joy will cloud these sunny days of his.) Space cadet Tara is on board to move some goods. But because of his indiscretion in spilling the beans to Tara, Silas will now study under the tutelage of ganja maestro Conrad. Or as Nancy put it, ”Make my boy your bitch.” A most excellent move.

I was also pleased to see Nancy talk to Valerie about her obvious shortcomings as a parent. We suspect Valerie (whom I totally adore) can relate. But over all, everything’s falling into place a little too nicely. Hopefully, this stuff will come to a head next week. Because as breezily enjoyable as Weeds has gotten after its intense detour into gangsta-ville this season, I’m worried that’s it has pulled a 180 and is quickly losing momentum.

I expect the enduring odd-coupling of Celia and Dean will offer some long-missed bite. Sidebar: Was dorky Dean’s motorcycle accident — shoved off the road, into a ditch, with animals peeing on him — a commentary on the evil mainstream-ification of icons of rebellion? Discuss. (And bonus points for factoring Jay Leno into said dialogue.) Poor Dean. I don’t know what’s more pitiful: the fact that his body is totaled; that his one means of liberation from his yuppie trappings has been taken away from him; that his friends are stealing both his morphine drip and his power of attorney; or that he’s back in Celia’s hands. Yeah, that last one’s pretty bad, amplified by the fact that caring for him will bankrupt Celia, who can’t sell her new Majestic home for legal — as in avoiding potential jail time — reasons. And we all know how that woman gets when she’s hard up for cash.

At least we’re clear on what Doug will do over a buck. After he told Sullivan and his golf-course peeps to ”kiss my black ass” (easily the episode’s most awesome quote) when they denied him entry, the existing S— Highway sprung a mysterious geyser-like leak. Oh, it is on! But more important, perhaps this purging of crap is an omen of more exciting things to come.

What do you think? Where is Nancy and Valerie’s relationship leading? Will Sullivan come to Celia’s rescue? Is Doug going to jail?

(This week, the theme song, ”Little Boxes,” was performed by Joan Baez. On a scale of 1 to 10, I give it an 8.)

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