VANDERPUMP RULES -- "Reunion" -- Pictured: (l-r) Stassi Schroeder, Raquel Leviss, James Kennedy -- (Photo by: Nicole Weingart/Bravo)
Credit: Nicole Weingart/Bravo

It’s the first Monday in May which means the Met Gala and the first installment of the Vanderpump Rules reunion! Raquel definitely dressed for the event but in a more DIY/Forever 21 version.

In lieu of recapping a recap, I’ve combed through the most important moments and revelations of the evening.

  • Tom Sandoval’s hair is keeping the reunion from starting on time.
  • Stassi says it’s been 6 months since the “dark passenger” has made an appearance.
  • Kristen announces that she’s single, which shocks a good portion of the group including Stassi.
  • Kristen’s choker is absurd.
  • James only speaks to Sandoval, Ariana, Scheana, and Schwartz and has no regrets about burning all his bridges.
  • Scheana admits she’s only dating “f— bois” and Andy applauds her decision.
  • Scheana and Adam are still “hangin and bangin.”
  • Lala thinks it’s no big deal that Randall isn’t on camera and everyone else thinks it’s unfair.
  • Lala implies Randall isn’t on the show because of his career but this is the man who produced Gotti.
  • Lotta discussion about the two Toms involvement in TomTom and how they feel sorta undervalued.
  • Raquel shows up looking like she’s auditioning for the Met Gala “Camp” theme and then announces she’s interviewed for a job at SUR. SIGH.
  • Raquel refers to herself as a “beauty queen” maybe 3 times.
  • She admits she doesn’t think that James was fully faithful to her before they moved in together.
  • “Just because you have a vagina doesn’t mean I’m going to support you.” Lala to Raquel.
  • Raquel and Lala are never gonna become friends.
  • Lisa can barely get through talking about her recently deceased brother.
  • There is a massive sort of hard to follow screaming match that begins with Jax and James and devolves into one huge shouting bonanza.
  • James and Jax almost start fighting until Andy breaks it up. Andy has become so much braver since being couch tossed by Teresa!
  • Why is James still on this show?
  • “Guys, shut the f— up!” Andy Cohen fittingly ending this part of the reunion.

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