And then there were five. … Too soon? Sorry blame it on the show. Blame everything on the show! Mary was a sweet, kind woman who was destroyed by Everlasting. Everyone seemed to be against her from the start.
Chet definitely wasn’t on Team Mary, especially this week. He says no guy wants “that” when he could have Grace. Chet is such a nice guy: He tells the whole control room, “Sad old momma is going down.” But Rachel and Quinn tell him he’s an idiot—as anyone in her right mind would agree—and bet him $50 that she’ll stay through the week.
The only problem is this week’s date is The Family Date, which Shia set up. Quinn says it’s a “Grade-A boner killer” (she is nothing if not a poet), so she tells Rachel she has to co-produce the date with Shia. Of course this makes Shia lose it. It really isn’t fair to her since she set up the date and has been coaching Mary from the beginning, but Shia also switched out the lady’s mood stabilizers for powdered nothing, so I don’t have too much sympathy.
From the start you can see the effects no pills+all the alcohol is having on Mary: She’s freer and chattier. When the black SUV pulls up with her daughter, Lilybell, her sister, Louise, and her niece and nephew, she immediately toasts to them with a mimosa. Her sister raises an eyebrow, but Mary swears it’s a virgin. It doesn’t take long for the sister to realize all the drinks a-flowing are most definitely not mocktails. Louise is concerned, but as a fan of the show, she’s loving being part of this Family Date probably a little too much to fully see what’s going on. But she’s not loving the Family Date nearly as much as Mary, who is loosening up more by the minute. She’s kneading pizza dough with Adam, Ghost style. No one does that Mary. Stop it.
But Chet wants to stir things up and ensure that he wins the $50, so he sends Anna in with a bunny. Sweet-as-sugar Anna says she just caught it and thought the kids might like to see it. Then Mary goes nuts and attacks her: “Everybody here might be blind as a bat, but I have eyes. I can see you.”
That’s when Louise finally sees there could be a problem. So instead of talking to her sister, she goes to Shia… you know the lady who is the reason Mary is like this. Louise asks how long she’s been drinking and then casually mentions she’s bipolar (which I don’t think we knew before?). And this causes me to seriously question why Dr. Wagerstein is allowed to have a medical license.
Quinn and Rachel decide they need to up the ante after Mary’s confrontation with Anna. Somehow the ex-husband comes up, and in their deluded minds, they decide it will be healthy for Mary to confront him on reality television. Rachel once read an article about how a woman confronting her abuser changed her life, so it’s settled: The ex is coming.
And with that, Quinn leaves Rachel in charge. She needs to go with Chet to pitch the next season of Everlasting to the network. Now that she’s a partner, she gets to be more involved in things like this. At the pitch, they play off each other perfectly. Quinn gives the stats; Chet gives the jokes; they have a perfect rapport from years of being a couple. And when they get back to the house, they almost fall into the same rut: They start making out in excitement of the pitch going so well, but are interrupted by a call from Cynthia. She’s calling to tell Chet he’s going to have a baby boy. That’ll kill the mood.
NEXT: Speaking of fathers…
Surprise! Kirk, Lilybell’s father and Mary’s ex (played by The 100‘s Ty Olsson!), is here! He thought Mary had agreed to his coming on and was ready to confront him. He’s pissed—and so is Shia. She’s yelling at Rachel for just doing it because of good TV. And remind me, Shia, why exactly did you swap out Mary’s pills for candy!? The situation devolves really quickly (“You’re a delusional hag” is not how you start a conversation about forgiveness), and the Suitor in Shining Armor himself decides to step in. But he’s no match to this angry ex. Even after two crew members pull him away, Kirk’s still going after everyone, but now he’s set his sights on Rachel, who he blames for bringing him into the situation.
Jeremy sees this and knocks him out before he can ever get to Rachel. Lizzie observes this from the corners and is not happy. Earlier in the day when she and Jeremy were trying to have sex in a storage truck—is no one on this show bothered by having sex while at work?—Jeremy got a little too rough for her tastes. She blamed it on him having “porn fantasies,” but I think we all know those are actually “Rachel fantasies.” All of this combines to be pre-marital troubles LIzzie thinks. She wants to postpone the wedding… which seems a bit like an overreaction?
If only Jeremy could juggle his women like Adam… He’s gone from arranging secret off-camera time with Anna to giving Mary a key (I’m confused by what the various jewelry gifts mean on Everlasting) and making out with her in front of her daughter.
It’s been a rough week for Adam putting up with all this crazy (“I’m sorry your job isn’t all BJs and pool parties,” Rachel jokes), but it’s been a really difficult week on Mary. She’s to the point in her confessional where her sentences don’t make sense. There are so many red flags here that it causes Rachel’s conscience to flare up. Shia just blames it on the ex-husband stunt—which she conveniently had nothing to do with.
Mary then says she just needs a minute, but she sneaks off to where they have Kirk waiting for the cops. He is restrained, but she still goes in there alone. THIS IS A TERRIBLE IDEA. She says that Adam loves her, and she’ll be just fine. But he goes straight for the jugular: He says there’s a darkness in her that brings out his violence, and she’s going to pass it on to Lilybell. “She’d be better off alone or with strangers.”
And it cuts away—I was certain she was going to stab him—but we next see Mary saying goodbye to her family. The Family Date has ended happily… oh, wait. What’s that Madison? Mary is on the roof? MARY IS ON THE ROOF?
You would think this would kick the crew’s non-existent hearts into action, but nope. Chet is just worried about who won the bet, and Quinn is just worried about her show: “Do you think I care about a bet? I have a girl on the roof and no camera.”
The only person who seems to care is Rachel; she quickly climbs up to the roof and tries to talk Mary down. But Mary—who is a week into being off her mood stabilizers and a week into being back on alcohol—doesn’t “want to feel this way” and she goes off the side of the roof.
Will Mary be okay? The blood all over Quinn’s hands when she cradles her (and the previews) indicates no. Will Everlasting get sued and finally be accountable for the emotional trauma it causes women? I hope so, but maybe I’m projecting from its real life counterpart. Will Shia’s pill trick get found out? I really hope so. Will the other girls complain in confessional that Mary’s getting too much attention after this? It pains me to say, but, most definitely yes.