The Exorcist premiere react: 'Janus'

Oh, hello!

Welcome back on this Friday evening. If you’re not expelling demons out of the weaker bodied on this Friday night, then what are you doing? Probably getting possessed yourself, honestly. It’s a new dawn on The Exorcist, and with God saving the Rances, who is saving Tomas and Father Marcus?

Well, that’s a great question.

Season 2 is a new world, y’all. We bid farewell to Geena Davis to greet the demons in a new host, and for now, her name is Cindy. Picking up where we left off, The Exorcist is dabbling in this cable world that dares to bribe us with a new story every season, and while we know our star will be John Cho (hey muffin, hello), for now we accept Cindy, a pregnant mother whose demons have led us into a field of corn, only prefaced by a piñata full of tar and evil.

But while our boys handle a demonized Cindy, we meet Andrew, the coolest dude bro foster dad of five in the game. I will always struggle to critique Cho, as we should all aspire to this level of cool bro dad-ness. He is a foster dad of five, with the youngest being Grace — a munchkin not quite ready for the school system with a penchant for Elvis peanut butter sandwiches and terrifying pillow masks. Andrew suggests that when their guest from Social Services comes for dinner, Grace joins them, if she wants, of course.

But back to the point! Cindy is vexed y’all. But then again, so is Tomas, who eco envisioned all that piñata party scene with Cindy. He’s tired and misses Chicago, but he saw what he saw. Inside a barn, he explains it to Marcus as they tie Cindy down to exorcise her (personal note, I prefer “exercise her” as in “do her Jane Fonda’s,” but I know we all exorcise/exercise in our own ways). But back at the barn with our girl Cindy, Marcus sends Tomas away to do some quick menial work. Behind, Demon Cindy reveals she knows why Marcus sent her away. She’s already seen inside Tomas, and he’s vulnerable and beautiful, which is how I like to describe myself, you know? Cindy vows to have him, and Cindy doesn’t seem like one to screw with.

But that’s when we go to our foster kids, trekking through Terabithia on the way to school talking about the Island Witch. They speculate if one of them might be it, as if we don’t already know that Grace is the sketchy one. Anyway, there’s a plank that one of the eldest kids dares another to stand on, and it’s the place where the Island Witch lures kids in, positioned over a well. He stands there, but another one of the foster kids stops him because foster siblings take care of their own. There is something super sketch about that well, though, guys. Keep watch for that soccer ball to come back into play.

Anyway, Andrew goes to meet the Social Services worker who there is no sexual tension with at all. She comes to stay with them in this absolutely gorgeous, beautiful house, and that’s when it’s revealed that Andrew and this Social Services Rose have a background. What is it? I suppose we’ll find out, but Andrew is definitely worried it will end up getting in the way. They agree that they’re here for the kids, and thank God because DEMONS ARE AROUND.

In the barn, Cindy seems to be lucid and super worried about her babies, which makes sense because, demons. She opens up about her husband and her baby with Marcus so that she’ll calm down. She asks if he has anyone, but Marcus says he’s married to the man upstairs. But that’s when Cindy goes full demon and says God doesn’t care about him because his collar is gone and he has nothing. It’s heavy, guys, but that’s what we signed up for on this Friday night! And it’s a perfect segue to the Andrew-Foster-Family-Dinner where that sassy older kid mocks the idea of a pre-meal prayer. And you know what? I bet she’s going to live to regret that.

But it’s at dinner when Caleb, the blind foster child, learns his dad didn’t show up for his custody hearing, meaning he’ll be around Andrew’s place a little bit longer. But Andrew loves that because he loves all his foster kids. Later that night, Rose is making her rounds when Caleb is spinning a record backward, because that’s not terrifying or anything. Man, these kids… it’s a toss-up of which one will have Satan in them because they’re all little terrors. And speaking of which, Grace comes downstairs in her pillowcase mask because she heard a noise. Who knows why that seemed like a good idea to her, but this is what we’ve signed up for. But as Andrew put her back to bed, he hears one of his other foster kids hyperventilating. He goes down to find him face to face with Rose. He’s on the spectrum, so Andrew pulls him close in a tight embrace before putting him back to bed. But as Andrew gets one kid back to bed, he loses another. Blind Caleb has gone missing, and with an open window and a curtain blowing, it doesn’t look super hopeful.

Elsewhere, in the supermarket, Tomas stops to grab supplies for the exorcism. But when he gets back, Marcus has put it together… Tomas went away because he was trying to battle Cindy on his own, and guess what? That doesn’t work, y’all! As Marcus chastises Tomas, he reminds Marcus that when Angela wasn’t able to be brought back, he brought him back. That’s when Marcus reminds our boy that with pride comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. Police show up as Marcus and Tomas are mid-exorcism, and Marcus leaves Tomas to finish the job.

Andrew, Rose, and the kids split up to find Caleb, and it’s not looking great. In the meantime, Tomas is doing his best to absolve Cindy of her demons while Marcus holds the cops at bay, but it seems that one of them is Jordy, Cindy’s husband, and he’s not here to play games. So they get into a bit of fisticuffs as Tomas continues to fight off the demons that are desperately trying to enter him via Cindy. In between demons, Cindy is screaming out for help, but it doesn’t look great. Tomas enters that world… the one we saw at the beginning of the episode.

We finally catch up with Caleb by the way, and he’s at that well counting to 10 trying to summon the Island Witch. And right as Andrew approaches him, the boards give way and he’s just barely saved from falling through. Ugh, these kids and their games! Speaking of games, Tomas has entered that church in his vision. He sees a bubbling liquid in what looks to be an offering cup. Inside the church, Patsy Cline’s “Walking After Midnight” is playing as he walks into confession. On the other side is Cindy, and it looks like she desperately wants to say something, but she can’t. We flash back to reality as it seems cops are about to take down Marcus for good, but as they pull a bloodied Marcus into the barn, the possessed Cindy chokes Tomas. It doesn’t look great, guys, but before we can get any real prognosis on Cindy, the cops knock Tomas down.

As she’s being carried away, Cindy growls, so clearly she’s not doing great. Back at the foster house, Caleb is safe and sound as well, with Grace (I still don’t trust her!) waiting. And if you were curious whether there was any relation between the two stories (of course there is), the handprints outside the church in Tomas’ vision is on the wall of Andy’s Foster Home for Kids Who Really Need Something To Believe In. So there you have it! I think John Cho and company are going to give us something major to look forward to, and you mark my words… never trust a broad named Grace, especially if she’s wearing a pillow mask, no matter how young and innocent she appears to be.

We wrote a react for this episode, which means we’ll just be checking in occasionally, but if this is a show you’d like to read about each week, please let us know! You can email chat@ew.com with your feedback and suggestions.