Carrie launches a long career of running from men down the streets of heels

By Tim Stack
Updated February 12, 2013 at 05:01 AM EST
Patrick Harbron/The CW
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And on this momentous day in February 2013, we, the television viewing public, learned the origins of some of Carrie Bradshaw’s greatest elements: her flower pins, her tutus and her ability to run from men in high heels. It honestly was like watching Batman Begins but for ladies and gays. For me, these little seeds are the most fun part of The Carrie Diaries and that’s why I enjoyed this week’s episode so much. It didn’t feel as scattered as last week’s. Plus there was a character named Kick Silver!! Hello love her. Love everything about that. My first-born child might be given the same name. Boy or girl, I don’t really care.

So the episode opened with Carrie at work, dressed a tad crazypants-ish, and bumping into George Silver, the grown son of her dad’s best pal Harlan. They apparently hung out when they were kids and Carrie makes a lil jab at him and calls him pretentious. Naturally, since this is a TV show, the cute guy thinks that’s charming. Now, lemme tell you folks, this kind of dialogue does not woo the gentlemens in real life. Otherwise, this sassy author would be married with children and in the midst of a Pilates session instead of recapping a CW soap. But I digress…George asks Carrie out to one of his mother’s big “soirees.” Oh and his mother is named Kick Silver. And she prefers to only call her parties “soirees.” So basically she is my favorite character currently on television.

Carrie is also in the midst of getting her driver’s license, which felt very very Clueless. “You’re just a virgin who can’t drive.” Don’t end up like that, Carrie! Unfortunately, Sebastian shows up near her parallel parking challenge with none other than Donna LaDonna! There appears to be a gazebo in the nearby park so I’m assuming the pair were reenacting the Rolf/Leisl number from Sound of Music. I mean that’s what teens did in the ’80s right? Anyhoo. Carrie messes up the parallel parking and nearly kills Sebastian and Donna (she eventually gets her license at the end). Even more awkward is having the follow-up conversation with her crush. Carrie brings up the fact that she has a date with George, which actually kinda reminded me of one of the original SATC episodes, when Carrie ran into Big after their first big break-up and told him she was dating the new Yankee. It also had vibes of when Carrie ran into Big at that weird Hamptons Ho-down and he was with Natasha for the first time. #SATCnerd

NEXT: Carrie meets Blythe…and we don’t mean Gwyneth’s mom

Carrie naturally needed something fancy for Kick Silver’s soiree so she heads to Century 21 — do we think she is aware that there are other stores in Manhattan? I mean let’s branch out a bit, girl. Barbara, the mean lady at Carrie’s office, is also randomly at the department store and actually becomes surprisingly helpful. She’s been at the company for years so she knows how Kick’s parties can be and helps Carrie figure out the right type of blue and the right type of dress. I’m kinda into Barbara now. Let’s get some personal story for this lady. I feel like she lives in Murray Hill with her family, a cat, and a collection of snow globes.

But then there’s a bit of a fashion disaster as George shows up in a tux to pick Carrie up from work and she’s wearing a cocktail dress. A Project Runway-style transformation occurs thanks to some tutus from Barbara’s daughter and Carrie and George are able to hit the party. Everyone is, of course, a snob there since it’s a party hosted by someone named Kick, and Carrie doesn’t fit in because she doesn’t live in the city and has curly hair. She particularly spars with the fabulously named Blythe, who used to be George’s girlfriend and just got out of rehab! More characters should be named Blythe, by the way. Blythe Danner has had near sole ownership of that name for too long.

Eventually, Carrie overheard Kick talking smack about her to George and she ran off…in heels. Ms. Bradshaw, little do you know how much this will come in handy later in life — whether it be chasing after a dog or launching down the streets of Paris. George explains that he doesn’t care about what his mother said and the pair return. But then Kick realizes that Carrie’s last name is Bradshaw and her mother was one of her best friends years ago. The pair have a really cute little sit-down about Carrie’s mom and Kick picks up a flower and puts in Carrie’s lapel, something Carrie’s mom used to do. Awwwwww. I got kinda misty!!

While all of this was happening, Mouse got pointers on sex from Walt. Yep, the closeted gay man is giving sex lessons now thanks to an instructional video he purchased. Mouse wanted to make sure she was satisfying her boyfriend Seth, who is really giving off some Adam Brody/Seth Cohen vibes.

Do I really have to talk about Maggie’s storyline? Eh. It was basically about how Donna tried to steal away their booth at the diner and Maggie wouldn’t allow it. It was not an awesome subplot. I need a little less time spent in the diner. This isn’t Alice!

Follow Tim on Twitter: @EWTimStack

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The Carrie Diaries

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