If only we could get some alone time, right, rose lovers? Instead, we have to watch Chris confront Lincoln again, and now Connor’s getting into the act, because Lincoln apparently told Becca that Connor is afraid of Chris too. Then Garrett comes back and snaps at Chris for putting Becca in such a bad “head state” that it “f—ed up the whole night.” He goes on to tell Chris to “get over it and move on,” because his grudge against Lincoln is ruining things for the other guys. (Becca, who’s pacing upstairs, hears all this, by the way.)
Garrett’s not the only one who’s angry. “If none of us get to talk to Becca tonight, I’m going to f—ing lose my s—,” says Wills, while Colton adds, “Y’all two need to just get on a plane and get out of here.” AMEN, former football player!
Eventually Becca returns and continues her conversations with the guys. Wills tells the Bachelorette that he’s “falling in love” with her, and it’s very sweet. (Wills for Bachelor, right? I mean, if he’s not a total jackass on Paradise, of course.) The date rose, however, goes to Colton.
The final one-on-one date of the week goes to Leo, which is weird because they have zero chemistry. But why nitpick? He and Becca hop on a plane for an aerial tour of Virginia, and while the scenery is lovely, the Bachelorette is feeling a little off. “I can’t get out of my head,” she admits. “It just felt… like I couldn’t give him the best side of me.” Leo listens patiently as Becca vents about the annoying drama on the group date and doesn’t try to fix things or explain away her feelings, which is nice. Then they put on waterproof pants and forage for oysters in the chilly waters.
Guys, why are we still watching this date? We all know Leo isn’t going to make it to the end — even after sharing that sad story about disappointing his father by not becoming a professional baseball player. Still, producers have a few more weeks to fill, so here we are. Having Opened Up™ sufficiently with his “I feel like I’m a not good enough” speech, Leo gets the date rose. (Oh, and a concert by some guy named Morgan Evans.)
Meanwhile, Chris is back at the hotel writing intensely in his journal. He’s definitely not pleased to see Leo walk through the door once again. “If Leo comes home, I really don’t think I’ll be around much longer,” he laments. From your lips to Harrison’s ears, buddy! Soon after Leo returns, Chris heads out to visit Becca at her hotel down the street. Does he really think that’s a good idea? More importantly, why is he so focused on Lincoln’s egg intake?
Knock-knock-knock! There’s a scruffy jerk at the door! Chris wants Becca know that he can “absolutely” see himself marrying her, but she’s all, Hold up — last week you wanted to go home, but this week you want to put a ring on it? Bish, please. He doesn’t make things any better by instructing Becca to “not think about that anymore.” Sorry, what? She’s not to think about your erratic, often-manipulative behavior? Again, Becca is not having it.
“Am I not allowed to express how I feel, though?” whines Chris. “I’ve been attacked for the last week and a half…”
“And you’ve also done some attacking,” says Becca, who then tells Chris again that she wants him to leave. “All right,” Chris mumbles, before refusing her offer to walk him out. “I don’t need, like, a walk out,” he pouts.
Fill in the blank, rose lovers! “This is great”? “This is long overdue”? Whatever, Chris is gone now — let’s enjoy our few weeks of peace before his jerk face is back on our screens thanks to Paradise.
The guys don’t have much time to celebrate Chris’s ouster, because the next night Harrison arrives and tells them Becca has canceled the cocktail party. Sucks for you guys, but good for us because it means the episode is almost over. But before we get to the rose ceremony, can I please take a moment to celebrate Becca’s dress?
What can I say? I’m a sucker for a beaded flower situation. Don’t @ me.
And the roses go to: Garrett, Blake, and Wills. That means the “journey” ends here for Connor and Lincoln, which totally fine with me (and probably all of Bachelor Nation).
Welp, we’re down to six guys, rose lovers! Before you click away, let me know your thoughts on this week’s adventure. Are you surprised that Leo got a rose? Does Jason have a shot at the final rose? And will you please support my #WillsForBachelor campaign? Post your thoughts below! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to ask a hypnotist to erase fake Abe Lincoln’s “emancipation” joke from my brain.
The Bachelorette airs Mondays at 8 p.m. on ABC.