Everyone finds themselves on the brink of new money-making ventures
Credit: Cliff Lipson/Showtime
Episode 803
S7 E5
Show MoreAbout Shameless
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So far, season 7 has taken everything we thought we knew about the Gallaghers and turned it on its head. Frank is, somehow, now a humanitarian; Fiona has turned her back on just about everyone; and our favorite juvenile delinquent/drug dealer, Carl, is actually begging to gain admission to a military school. Could the neighborhood gentrification they’ve been fighting the past few seasons finally be helping them in some way? Let’s dive into the latest episode, “Own Your Sh*t.”

We’ll begin with Fiona (again). Tonight, we see her having sex with a Tinder guy who happens to be a financial consultant. He gives her some minor business advice and lets her know there’s plenty more where that (and everything else) came from.

Shortly after this encounter, she discovers the Gallagher home’s washing machine — a thoughtful, but perhaps shoddy, gift from the great Jimmy/Steve (*pouring one out for Jiona, RIP*) — is no longer working. As with most things nowadays, Fiona throws up her hands, claims she’s not handling it, and heads to a Laundromat instead.

The local Laundromat is owned by an adorable older woman named Etta (an excellent June Squibb!). She seems to be going senile, and explains to Fiona how “some suits from the north side” have been trying to buy her lease so they can make the Laundromat into a Starbucks.

Later that day, Fiona heads to Margo’s (the owner of Patsy’s) office to discuss a raise, in light of all she’s done for Patsy’s lately. She finds Chad there, so she gives her whole spiel to him instead. She explains how well Patsy’s is doing (thanks to her efforts) and says she has more ideas, but would like a “reasonable cut.” Chad’s not impressed, especially since she’s putting all this effort into a restaurant they were prepared to shut down anyway. He tells her “You have to own something to make real money, and Margo’s the only owner here.” Fiona leaves with no raise and messages the Tinder finance guy again, looking for more financial advice and more sex. He says something similar to what Chad told her — people who are rich usually own something, or in some cases, a lot of something.

The next day, Fiona sees Etta being bothered by the “suits” she mentioned before. Fiona takes this opportunity to try to own something: She offers to help Etta turn the Laundromat around, to make it more modern and in line with what customers want now. Etta seems resistant.

Back at Patsy’s, Margo shows up to talk to Fiona. Fiona goes over the numbers to prove she’s enhanced the place, and Margo offers her $25 more a week.

Ian Calls Fiona Out

One of the episode’s major scenes involves V, Ian, and Fiona. V came over to bring Fiona some items she had of hers — heels, clothes, and keys to the house. Since they’re no longer speaking (and presumably no longer friends), V sees no reason to keep the keys to the Gallagher home. Fiona essentially ignores her, but tells V she’ll return her stuff at some point, too. It’s an icy, cold situation.

V is also there to bring Ian his clothes. When the Gallagher washer broke, Ian opted to do his laundry at Kevin and V’s. Fiona criticizes him for not going to a Laundromat like everyone else, to which he says, “Well, just because you want to ice everyone out doesn’t mean I have to.” Somehow, Ian has become the only voice of reason in this show.

But he doesn’t stop there, asking Fiona what’s up with the way she’s been acting towards everyone (FINALLY!). Fiona’s answer is to brag about herself and her work accomplishments, to which Ian says, “Jesus, how hard can managing a diner be for you to stop giving a shit about us and V?” Fiona is somehow shocked by this comment, as if she was unaware of how she’s been treating her family and friends.

Fiona eventually walks away, claiming she’s “not going to apologize for getting her life together.” To Ian’s point, no one asked you to apologize for getting your life together, Fiona. But perhaps you could apologize for being such a cold b-tch to your friends and family while doing it.

NEXT: Who would put Frank in charge of anything?

Frank The Philanthropist

After his TV appearance last week, Frank actually managed to get his homeless shelter the attention he was looking for — so much so a billionaire, Simon Epstein, purchased the house and officially made it public housing. Other donors and nonprofits are also interested in keeping the location running as a homeless shelter, making Frank the point person for a sudden influx of both money and attention.

Just one question, though: With all the millions of people Frank has double-crossed, betrayed, offended, or used in his life, not one of them was able to call BS on him being the figurehead of something like this?

Anyway, now that the house has the luxury of hot running water, Frank sends his no-longer-homeless troops out to panhandle in a variety of areas. Everyone seems happy to take direction from him, almost like a cult leader directs his or her flock. Meanwhile, Frank continues to handle all cash flow for the shelter’s residents, and also finagles free, brand-new appliances and furniture for the house. Unbelievable.

What Everyone Else Is Up To

Poor Debbie. Yes, she got herself into this situation by having a baby; yes, she’s suffering from a strong case of teenage-girl attitude. But does she deserve the crazy pressure Fiona is putting on her? I don’t think so.

Debbie continues to avoid Fiona as she tries to scrounge up the $300+ she owes her in the next 48 hours. She takes some advice from Frank and decides to panhandle. Debbie makes some minimal cash and runs into Tanya. In case you forgot, she was part of the inspiration for Debbie’s current situation. Tanya was the baby momma of Derek’s brother, and back in season 5, Debbie saw how Derek’s family welcomed Tanya once she was having his brother’s baby. Debbie got the idea she could do the same, except Derek obviously wanted nothing to do with his baby. And now, we see exactly where this idea got her.


Later, Debbie looks into which body parts she could sell for money. Much later, Debbie runs into a disabled man who turns out to be Sierra’s brother. His name is Neil, and he was in a skateboarding accident that caused brain damage. Debbie learns he has his own apartment — with his own money — where he’s basically all alone, with no one to care for him. She feels like it’s fate they met.

In the episode’s final scene, the Department of Child Services makes a random visit to the Gallagher house. The man is looking for Debbie and informs everyone they’re opening an investigation into her fitness as a parent. As it turns out, the video of her fighting with the homeless woman — while carrying her crying baby — found its way online.

NEXT: Turns out Lip’s a great fit for his law-breaking employer

Lip is ready to hack. While on another walk-and-talk with his boss, Lip is told what items to order for the new office space. He explains to Lip that yes, the company gets shut down every once in a while, but they budget for it; while the Feds can continue to go after them, there’s nothing illegal about fantasy sports and swiping credit cards.

This gets Lip’s gears turning. While he’s spending time setting up new user accounts in the company system, he sees just how easy it would be to hack into it and create a flow of cash to his own bank account. Lip gets in touch with his friend from college, Joaquin, to help him in this venture, and the two get to work.

Ian struggles with his feelings. Ian goes out with Trevor to another club, where they end up kissing. Trevor calls him out on it the next day and Ian plays coy, saying Trevor came on to him. Trevor says he understands if Ian doesn’t want to admit he likes a trans dude, and he can handle it if Ian just wants to be friends.

Later, Ian admits to Kev he feels really confused about things with Trevor. He finds Trevor attractive, but when it comes down to it, he doesn’t know if he can “suck a silicone c-ck.” So much is at play here for Ian. It’s an interesting story line to see him be so unaware of other types of sexuality and struggle with what he believes he’s ultimately attracted to.

Kev, V, and Svetlana talk adoption. While Svetlana was balancing The Alibi’s books, the conversation of adopting each other’s children comes up. This would give them a tax break (since Svetlana and V are married, and each have their own children) and they decide to apply. Kevin isn’t quite on board, though — he continues to feel like a third wheel to Svetlana and V’s marriage, regardless of where he falls sexually. Plus, adopting each other’s children would legally solidify them as a family, but not really for Kev (since he’s not legally married to V).

During this whole process, they apparently just found out they need to get their children vaccinated.

Carl doesn’t get in to military school. Despite Dom’s dad’s glowing recommendation, there was no room for Carl in the current military-school class. He tells Dom’s dad about this, and complains the remaining spots were reserved for “people of color.” Dom’s dad doesn’t want to hear Carl’s complaints about being white, but then offers to take him to a DNA testing facility to see if he has any black, Asian or Native American heritage that might qualify him for one of the “diversity” spots. It turns out Carl is 30-percent Native American, and he reapplies for one of the remaining spots.

What did you think about the many money-making ventures everyone got into this episode? How about Fiona’s latest antics with Ian, Lip, and V? Talk to me in the comments!

Honorable Mentions

  • “I guess you’re gonna have to date another sh-thead con artist to replace it for us.” —Lip, on how the Gallaghers should go about getting a new washing machine
  • “Oh, Flintstones livin’ up in here?” —Carl
  • “WE got tax returns?” —Kev
  • “Stick a sign with you and a baby in your arms, and just watch the middle-class pity roll in.” —Frank, encouraging Debbie to beg for money on the street
  • “Join the club. Nobody making a paycheck is getting paid what they’re worth.” —Chad, on Fiona’s complaints about her paycheck
  • “It’s so weird how we have to keep explaining our situation to people. It’s like they’ve never heard of a mé·nage à three.” —Kevin
  • “People of color, son. Don’t call them ‘colored people.’” —Dom’s dad
  • “I’ve been dealing with toddlers all day, talking about ABCs. Telling ‘em what sound a cow makes. It’s moo, motherf-cker. Its moo.” —Kev, further solidifying himself as my favorite character of season 7

Episode grade: B

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Episode 803
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