Scorpion recap: Cuba Libre
While Cabe searches out a war criminal, Happy searches out the world’s best noise-cancelling app.
Cuba is one of those places that exists in a shroud of mystery. Most people don’t know much about the country: It’s communist, has renowned cigars, and is home to a wonderful sandwich that really knows how to leverage a pickle. Cuba is also the location of this week’s episode because season 2 is going so international that you need a passport to literally turn it on.
But before we get to Cuba, Walter is tasked with signing a statement admitting that his emotions got in the way of his driving in last season’s finale; otherwise, he faces court time. He won’t actually admit to it though because he doesn’t have emotions proving once and for all that boys are silly. Speaking of silly boys, Sylvester’s anxiety is getting in the way of his feelings for Megan, but no time for that right now! Sonia is here.
Sonia first met Cabe when he saved her in Serbia from an awful war criminal named Zoric. Classic Cabe. Before he left her, he gave her his Silver Star for bravery. But Sonia has tracked him down because she has a mission. She has come looking for Cabe because she decided to find the bravest man she knows. Their plan? Extract Zoric straight from Cuba and bring him to justice.
Adriana Molina, already proving to be the voice of reason, lets Cabe know that Homeland Security has nothing to do with this situation. And that’s when she goes on a long tangent about how pull off an extraction in Cuba because if Adriana Molina is anything, she’s a giver. She warns them that if they’re caught, she will deny helping because Americans attempting a quasi-governmental extraction on Cuban soil is dangerous — almost as dangerous as when Jay Z and Beyoncé brought back Cuban cigars from vacation.
Next thing you know, they’re on an airplane headed for Cuba — strike that — jumping out of one. As #TeamScorpion waddles out of the ocean, they complain about being waterlogged and sandy, while Paige sashays out like a supermodel. She immediately catches Walter’s attention, but he doesn’t notice because, you know, “no emotions.”
The team jumps into the scene immediately and waits outside for Zoric to appear from a restaurant, but it’s way too early in the episode to catch him, so an SUV casually blows up and Zoric escapes. Frustrated, the team tries to establish a plan — a plan that must work in seven hours because that’s the amount of time Adriana Molina has bought them. If they don’t finish, their plane out of Cuba will leave without them. YIKES. Or in computer speak, .
The team of geniuses deduce that Zoric will try to change his identity, so he’ll head to a barber to lose his beard. It doesn’t seem socially logical at the height of a “lumbersexual” craze, but when you’re a war criminal, trends don’t carry the same gravitas as they do in America. The team is correct, and Zoric goes for a beard trim. In an elaborate plan that requires drain-off water, a van, and the desperate need for a barber with shaky hands, Happy waits near a drain for Zoric’s barber, Ernesto, to slip and nick Zoric’s neck. Impatient, Cabe and Walter sneak in and force Ernesto to leave, but in the exchange, it’s Sonia who ends up with the straight blade to Zoric’s neck.
NEXT: A classic case of sausage fingers
They get the blood sample, but that’s when Sonia loses her mind and contemplates cutting his jugular outright. Naturally, there’s a fistfight that ends with Zoric getting arrested. Paige, attempting to value reason over emotion, explains to Sonia how important it is to keep her composure in situations like this. If you listen closely, you can hear a soft chuckle echo across the nation.
The team only has 90 minutes left to get out of Cuba, but they need to pick up a bank ledger with 23 war criminals on it. Unfortunately, Walter and the team gave him a sedative that has knocked him out for hours.
They decide to break into the bank on their own — on top of it, that SUV that blew up earlier in the episode? Definitely connected back to the team and an A.P.B. has been put out for all of them. Walter devises a plan to shut off the alarm system to the vault that contains the ledger. Happy and Walter use an app to cancel out all noise while they saw into the steel vault because that’s how science works.
Quickly, they realize that the lockbox containing the ledger requires a fingerprint, and they won’t be able to get in without Zoric’s thumbprint because that’s how science really works. A bank worker shows up with a patron, and Happy panics. Toby comes up with a plan and somehow fashions a mimic of Zoric’s thumbprint out of a hot sausage wrapped in cigarette ashes. It works, confirming that I will be spending the rest of my life attempting to use a sausage to recreate my fingerprint.
The team pulls Happy out of the bank, loads up in the van and heads for the plane. As they speed toward the aircraft, Zoric jumps out of the back. The team has everything it needs, but Cabe made Sonia a promise, and Cabe is NOT one to break a promise. Cabe and Sonia bail from the van and go after Zoric. Like a boss, Sonia catches him first, throws him to the ground, and holds him down by his throat with a gun pointed at his head. She doesn’t shoot, though, because her humanity is bigger than his. That’s why she’s the good guy.
Back in the States, the mission is announced on television, and Zoric is officially arrested. Adriana Molina gets credit and sets up another press conference, but I’m not as mad this time because she was the reason the team was able to go. Also because her hair was super strong this week. It’s a big week for everyone, as Sylvester finally admits he loves Megan, and in the warehouse, Sonia thanks Cabe and tells her that she doesn’t have to be brave anymore. She hands Cabe’s Silver Star back to him and leaves.
Walter rounds out the episode by asking Paige how to separate logic from emotion, and she explains why she worked at the diner and how she was scared after running out of money for her and Ralph. She didn’t let emotion get in her way, though, and explains that sometimes you have to separate emotion until after the fact. That’s when Walter finally admits to being too emotional behind the wheel last season and accepts his community service.
We finish out the episode by meeting Ray, who is doing community service with Walter. Fun fact: That won’t be the last time we see Ray. Keep an eye out for him this season. As everyone knows, the friends with the best backstory are the ones you meet in community service.
What do you think Ray’s backstory is? And do you think Toby should get community service too for littering? I vote yes.