After a run-in with a raptor, Rosie O'Donnell's train-wreck character once again needs Sean and Christian's services; plus, Sean is tempted and tormented by Eden

By Tim Stack
November 21, 2007 at 05:00 AM EST
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”Nip/Tuck” recap: The return of Dawn Budge

I know this might seem a bit dramatic, but that was the greatest opening sequence of a Nip/Tuck episode ever! Much of the credit goes, of course, to guest star Rosie O’Donnell, returning as the super-rich patient Dawn Budge. Can Dawn please become a regular cast member? She once again got herself into a situation requiring Christian and Sean’s services. During a hang-gliding trip, an eagle attacked her and made her crash-land. It sounds terrifying, but it came off as hilarious. In any case, the accident gave Dawn a new sense of freedom and confidence, inspiring her to join the space program. I’m hoping for an upcoming episode with Dawn on the moon.

But it got even better. Dawn was victimized by an ”ass bandit”! Yes, an ass bandit. Some fella snuck into the recovery room and told her he needed a stool sample to test for bird flu (yikes!). It turned out he is just some pervert who’s been raiding plastic surgery clinics all over the L.A. area. In order to make nice with Dawn and keep her from suing, Sean took her on the set of Hearts ‘n Scalpels. But Dawn, blessed with the worst luck possible, got a light dropped on her head. Upon regaining consciousness, she fell in love at first sight with the seemingly gayer than gay Freddy (Oliver Platt), all set to the tune of ”Dream Weaver.” Love it! Genius! Dawn and Freddy made another trip to McNamara/Troy to get him a little butt lift. Not something I want to particularly think about, but it certainly made me giggle. Dawn, upon seeing her new boyfriend post-surgery, said, ”Look at that gorgeous bumper. As tasty and delicious as a Cinnabon but half the calories.” Unfortunately, Freddy was also visited by the ass bandit, although he seemed to enjoy it a bit more than Dawn. Hmmmm. Wonder what that means?

Less entertaining were Sean’s ongoing struggles with Kate (Paula Marshall). Ugh. Can this lady please be written off the show? Or at least can they name her Downer McGee? Because she sinks every scene she’s in. Sean definitely deserves better, especially since he’s become the new-and-improved buff Sean. But he’s definitely grappling with some personal demons, by which I mean Eden. Still, I don’t think he had to propose to Kate. Come on, dude!

Christian, meanwhile, got trapped in a story line that could best be described as Flatliners meets Red Shoe Diaries. Did anyone else think that messed-up lady looked and sounded an awful lot like Kathleen Turner? She wanted Christian to stop her heart and then bring her back to life through sex. You know this only boosted Christian’s ego more. A woman was comparing his sexual prowess to the gift of life. I wonder if Christian’s little foray into prostitution is at all inspired by the other job of his former girlfriend Michelle (Sanaa Lathan). Further proving he’s going to hell, Christian even fondled a nun during an exam. It turns out the nun was meant to meet Christian. She told him that she saw an inkling of good in him and gve him a medallion that later appeared to help revive the crazy woman when she yet again tried to off herself. It was great to see Christian freaking out and actually feeling remorse for what he was doing. It’s as if he saw how far he had gone over to the dark side and needed that to bring him back. But let’s not turn him into too much of a nice guy now, Nip/Tuck writers.

Terrifyingly, Annie has become like a new plaything for Eden, poisoning her mind with the idea that she’s overweight. Eden even persuaded the young girl to try bulimia after Sean refused to do liposuction on his own daughter. Eden is turning into one helluva villain and a relatively believable one, too. Teen girls are pretty mean in my experience. Of course, Olivia doesn’t believe her daughter is to blame for Annie’s behavior. Clearly, Eden has planted notions, but I definitely think growing up in a plastic surgeon’s home would give Annie certain ideas, too. Annie ended getting expelled from school thanks to some kind of tryst she had with another student, no doubt inspired by Eden. This show loves to give the cast crazy love interests, with even crazier children. This story line is somewhat similar to the Ava-Adrian story line of season 2. And yet, I’m not really bothered. It’s more compelling.

What do you think? Will Christian’s religious experience change him? Will he and the nun see each other again? And is Sean going to give in to Eden’s temptation?

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