They're back... and change is coming
Credit: Ray Mickshaw/Fox
S6 E1
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Summer is just about over *sigh* but with the changing season comes fall TV, including the return of the adorkable New Girl with its season 6 premiere. In the episode, directed by star Zooey Deschanel, the newly married Schmidt and Cece are house hunting, Winston gives long-distance a try with girlfriend Aly, and Nick comes back early from New Orleans, where he temporarily moved to be with Reagan.

Everyone seems to be moving forward, except the self-described “old Jess the mess” that is. In the season 5 finale, she realized she still has feelings for Nick, and those feelings certainly have not gone away, as exemplified by her extreme awkwardness around her ex/roomie when he suddenly returns to the loft. So let’s get to it! Here are the top 5 “loft”-iest moments from “House Hunt.”

The worst realtor ever? With Aly away at FBI training, Winston takes Aly’s sister, Leslie (Ayden Mayeri), under his wing so to speak. She’s a realtor, so what better way to help her out than by putting her to work for Schmidt and Cece? It’s a good idea in theory, but Leslie is straight-up awful at her job. “Every morning I just Google ‘house’ and sometimes stuff comes up,” she says of how she found Schmidt and Cece’s dream home — which they realize isn’t actually on the market when they meet its resident. “How did we get into the house,” Schmidt asks. “We walked through it three times.” Winston then fires Leslie on behalf of Schmidt and Cece, but he ends up hiring her himself so Aly wouldn’t get upset. He ultimately fires Leslie again when she suggests he live in a boat.

Schmidt’s house-hunting style. After Leslie is fired, Schmidt and Cece set out to find a house on their own. Of course, Jess inserts herself into that process since she’s trying to find new projects to keep her mind off of Nick (hence her trying her hand at Portuguese and woodworking). Schmidt really wants to do this as a couple, so no Jess. No surprise, he’s also very particular, and has a wonderfully ridiculous attitude, about the little things in the hunt. “The en suite is on fleek,” he says while at an open house. “I poked my head in the shower. Perfect, gentle, unrelenting pressure, like when my mom made me practice my haftorah portion.” What’s more, he insists on testing out the kitchen by making eggs, and has two on hand as well as a miniature pan. “You think I’m going to buy a house and not make an egg first?”

Winston’s go at long distance. Winston and Aly put their love to the test when she leaves town to pursue her career, and they’re as cute and sweet as they were when they were in the same city. They’re also totally weird, but in an endearing way, like when they wrap their video chat by singing what appears to be a pre-established sign off, crooning about how much they love each other and how they’re hanging up now.

Jess losing her cool. Well, not sure that Jess ever really had her “cool” to begin with, but when she finds Nick at the loft (he’s back early because Reagan’s job relocated her to Seattle, so they’re also doing long distance) any cool she had goes right out the window. She’s completely shocked to find him in the apartment, then freaks out when he says he has something important to tell her so she makes up perhaps the worst excuse ever. “I have to go to the zoo,” Jess says. Nick points out that she hates zoos, but Jess continues and it gets worse. “I’m supposed to meet her in the lemur section of the parking lot, like 10 minutes ago.” She heads to the bank to meet Cece and Schmidt, interrupting their meeting about upping their loan for the very expensive home they just toured, because she just can’t cope with the Nick situation. She can’t escape him, however, as he soon comes to the bank to co-sign with Schmidt. Jess lunges toward a teller’s desk nearby in an attempt to hide, and he freaks out thinking she’s a robber (Imagine that, Jess, a robber…).

Jess confronting her feelings for Nick. With a little help from Winston, who helps Jess make that first literal step into Nick’s room, Jess finally talks to Nick like a somewhat normal human being, and makes her best effort at learning to be just friends again. He tells her that he finally finished his book while in New Orleans and made a very special dedication: “To Anthony Rizzo and the Chicago Cubs for all we’ve been through and to my friend Jessica Day for the same thing.” He thanks her for being the one to tell him to go to New Orleans, where he was inspired. The moment is interrupted by Schmidt and Cece announcing that they got the house — the house turns out to be a dump that they’ll fix up, not the nice, expensive one they were eyeing earlier — but it was very sweet. Who knows what’ll happen with Nick and Jess, and Nick and Reagan for that matter, but here’s to finding out in the season ahead.

Honorable Mentions:

  • Jess getting totally jacked (like to the point where she could lift a refrigerator comfortably), as part of her efforts to distract herself to get over Nick.
  • Schmidt’s inability to say coupon.
  • Nick’s grand return, with “Craw Daddy’s home, and he’s ready to see his Craw Kids!”
  • “I’m a Sagittarius, which is why I’m so good with people and horses, but it also makes me really sleepy.” —Leslie
  • Winston’s supposed belly button ring. “Who gets a belly button ring if you have an outie?” Cece asks Schmidt of that decision.
  • The banker with attitude who wants nothing to do with Schmidt and Cece.
  • This line, from Winston: “For the third time in my life I have to call off a boat purchase.” Can we get some backstory on those other two times?
  • The crew celebrating Schmidt and Cece’s good news by starting to tear the place down and popping champagne.

Episode Recaps

New Girl

Zooey Deschanel plays lovable Jess, who is plodding through life with a good group of friends.

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