Peggy and Teddy wed, Rayna and Luke bed, and Juliette gets a last-minute CRAZY PLOT TWIST
Short recap: Teddy got married and nobody cared.
Long recap: “She’s Got You” was a pretty slow-moving episode until the last 10 minutes… and was then capped off by an INSANE plot-twisting final 10 seconds in which Olivia Wentworth — a Juliette Barnes super-fan unhappily married to Juliette’s current eff-buddy Charles — gave new meaning to the term “jealous wife” by planting a kiss on the country queen.
“I know you’re sleeping with my husband,” Olivia crazy-eyed Juliette while inching toward her prey. “But what I don’t understand is why you’re not sleeping with me.” What?! Hilarious. And here we thought she’d just crucify Juliette and Charles with a good old-fashioned public shaming after catching them in the act post-polo match.
I can’t imagine the lesbian plot line going too much further — Juliette loves her fans, but she also loves herself some fresh man meat — and as we heard from her in tonight’s best line, “Nice just ain’t my color.” Great episode-ender for sure. But what now?
Juliette spent the hour standing up for women’s rights and ordering her new boy toy — who owns a company called (and also is a) “Media Mogul” — to fire and then rehire nasty Houston radio personality Bobby Delmont, dubbed “Santa Claus” because young girls have to sit on his lap to get airplay. Gross gross gross.
Juliette unloaded on Charlie about how hard it is to be a lady in the country music business: “You just smile and pretend you don’t hate everybody who’s using you.” Well, no more! She put on her fakest, sweetest smile and hate-blasted Mr. Claus right to his face in her dressing room, demanding he give her twice as much airplay as that wannabe Layla Grant if he wants to keep the job he doesn’t deserve. She owns him. I love how she swiveled back around to the mirror, where the more important stuff was happening (lip gloss), before barking at him to “Get out!” And this delicious snipe also trumpeted….
….the return of Juliette’s Thong Dress! Welcome back, newish friend. Never leave us.
NEXT: Maddie loves her new, real dad The emotional thrust of the hour (sorry for using the word thrust) belonged to Deacon and Maddie, who bonded in person instead of separately, in their own dreamy-eyed gazes, of what it might be like if they had a real relationship. The relationship is on, baby! No turning back now. And Maddie’s LOVING it. Deacon’s been afraid of disappointing people after the accident; he’s just so damn tired of that damn look in their eyes, in their faces. But all of Maddie’s expressions toward him are now these full-on love-gushes.
Is it too much too soon? In reality, probably. But this is TV, where there’s limited screen time in which to convey a budding father-daughter relationship. So Maddie and Deacon’s heavy-handed gestures — him pointing at her as he sings “Fly, my child”; her enthusing that she must have inherited her inability to sing sans guitar from him — are par for the course. I was rolling my eyes at the conversation about genetics I couldn’t believe was taking place in broad nightlight, but soon cranked out two large tears as Deacon sputtered out, “You’re growing up fast….but not too fast, okay? I just got here.” Aggghh! He just got there!
Deacon and Avery’s cover of “You’re the Kind of Trouble” marked Deacon’s first return to the Bluebird Café since his and Rayna’s accident, as well as Avery’s 48th Foursquare check-in of the month. (Mister Mayor.) “Even though I haven’t been around doesn’t mean I haven’t been thinking about this moment every single day,” he assured the crowd but more importantly his daughter. It wasn’t the performance of his lifetime, but it was better than the sad open-mic comedy routine he’d have had to attempt at Shotgun Sally’s. To be fair, the jerky half-chicken half-robot dance Deacon had been workshopping in his milk-less home would definitely qualify as a laugh riot, so he’d have been fine either way.
I’m really liking the Deacon-Avery buddy comedy!
BEEN THERE. Don’t pretend you haven’t.
NEXT: ‘You gotta cut the world a little slack, otherwise you will just go crazy.’ Earlier, Maddie stepped it up and performed with her little sister Daphne at Teddy’s boring wedding to awful Peggy. I could just listen to Lennon and Maisy Stella sing all day, even if Peggy was standing in the corner, vaguely haunting me. They’re that good. Peggy’s the worst, but Teddy had an incredibly sweet scene with Maddie in which he reassured her, “You were my first girl.” That line earned him multiple Mid-Song Eyebrow Raises of Approval — Maddie’s signature move. They’re so much more prominent now that she’s a grown-up with contacts.
Maddie wanted to ditch her sleepover that night and “just come home and sit” — I love that! Just sit! My pastime! — she told Rayna on the phone, unknowingly interrupting another sleepover between… Rayna James and Luke Wheeler!
Rayna is just hookin’ it up left and right — earlier this season with Liam St. Lucia and now with country superstar Luke, who Bronco’d her out to the middle of his land to shoot at some bottles and help “distract” her from her Maddie/Deacon and Teddy/Peggy worries. (That “check out all my land” scene reminded me of Juliette and Deacon’s songwritin’ and skinny dippin’ adventure in season 1.)
Turns out Luke’s been through a similar saga in recent years: His ex-wife remarried and now he has to co-parent with some other dude. It’s not ideal. But you learn to live with it, he told her from experience. I loved the aha! moment Luke provided Rayna: “You gotta cut the world a little slack, otherwise you will just go crazy.” He’s no Liam, but with lines like that, he’s cool with me.
Meanwhile, two unlikely love interests, Gunnar and Jeff Fordham, went out on their very first date. Gunnar was somehow able to squeeze a fancy restaurant meeting with Jeff into his busy schedule of brooding and flopping around his pigsty apartment with his ex-girlfriend’s best friend. (Zoey’s big plot point in this episode is that she wears a lacy blue bra to bed.)
Jeff wants that song Gunnar won’t give him, so he promised him a performance slot in the upcoming Music City Music Festival. All he has to do to earn it is go out on the road to write with an Edge Hill artist and learn “what it takes to make it at this label.” (Um, $$$?) And the lucky Edge Hill artist is….
NEXT: ‘About time, cowboy’ ….Luke Wheeler! Hey, Scarlett’s on tour with Luke Wheeler right now. They put her at the back of the bus and everything, not up front in a bunk like some commoner. Just as our favorite ethereal doily finished explaining to Avery over the phone that she’s so darn small she could fit into the glove compartment, her former knight in pining plaid (nope, that doesn’t really work) slithers on board, a mirage of dark denim and chiseled jaw lines. Drama! Quick, Scarlett, trade lives with me. That bus bed looked super cozy. I just want to… sit. I swear.
Will Lexington — now a dark and twisted country antihero who could star in his own comic books with that signature black cowboy hat — welled up with rage after seeing his former flame Brent with his new boyfriend, Craig Hale. (Thanks for the full name…not.) He opted out of a double date with Layla and the happy couple and instead pouted at the hotel bar and refused to intervene when two homophobic sports fans came in and called Brent and Craig “pervs.”
But Gay Batman just needed ample space, and dimmer lighting, to facilitate his dark deeds. He later caught up with the homophobes in the parking garage and kicked both of their asses with seemingly very little effort. Whoa! Okay, Will! Now what? Who would be treated to his adrenaline-fueled hardbody next?
Ewww. It’s Santa Claus lap-lover Layla Grant. Will popped in on his fake love interest (remember, they’re in an Edge Hill-orchestrated showmance to keep up appearances and boost sales) and made a move — even though he knows she sabotaged his friend Scarlett a few weeks ago on the press line. And even though he’s gay. “About time, cowboy,” she marveled. This does not bode well.
Hmmm… should I go into more detail about how Peggy didn’t want to postpone the wedding for the sake of “the constituents,” who wouldn’t want to see their political hero (in what universe?) have a child (“a child”) out of wedlock?
Didn’t think so.
Loose, Gorgeous Connie Britton Wave of the Week
Somewhat blurry, but chosen for the emotional punch this moment packed. Go back and watch how the waves on the left gently fluttered as Rayna basked in the warm yellow glow of Deacon and Maddie’s getting-to-know-you giggles!
Your thoughts on “She’s Got You”? Will Scarlett and Gunnar get back together? Will Layla try to steal Thong Dress? Did any of you predict the Olivia-Juliette lady-lover twist?
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