Claire and Phil feel intellectually inferior, Jay sticks his foot in his mouth, and 24's Mary Lynn Rajskub plays Mitchell's ex-girlfriend
Credit: Randy Holmes/ABC; Bob Charlotte/PR Photos
Mitch and Cam, Modern Family

I’m not going to lie, after last week’s fabulous welcome-back, I was left feeling a little uninspired after tonight’s episode. I’m never truly disappointed with any Modern Family, and of course I laughed, but I think it was hard to follow last week’s James Marsden in the toy castle, Gloria learning to ride a bike, action-packed episode. But I will say this, I did not see tonight’s Mitchell/Cam punchline coming. With the long lead-up and the various dramatic “reactions” of Cam, then Mitchell, I figured the chances of Mitchell having a little mini-me running around were pretty unlikely (though I would have thought the chances of Mitchell having sex with a woman — twice! — would have been pretty slim too, so I guess anything is possible). But when the misunderstanding between Mitchell and his maybe-baby-mama ex-girlfriend, Tracy (24‘s Mary Lynn Rajskub), turned out to be that Mitchell’s “8-year-old love child” was actually Tracy’s little-person husband, it was pleasantly surprising, and pretty darn funny, and possibly a little un-PC, but mostly pretty darn funny. And when Cam and Mitchell gave him the Little Slugger baseball mitt and Cam hauled ass out of there, well, that was just the perfect conclusion to a painfully awkward situation.

Besides Mitchell and Cam’s personal “reactions” to the possible existence of a genetic mini-Mitchell, my favorite moments were between Claire and Phil. We got to see them interact in a very different way tonight. So much of their comedy normally comes from their nit-picking brand of love—it’s their differences and endless bickering that usually make us giggle, but tonight we got to see them bond and be silly as a unified team, albeit over their true love of cheesy cinema and sneaking snacks, but what could be better to bond over?

Honorable-mention moments of the evening:

–Luke trying to throw grapes into Alex’s mouth like the Hungry Hippo

–Cute little Lily turning into a klepto

–Jay drinking out of the dribble cup

–Phil in 3-D glasses

–Phil and Claire walking into the glass door while trying to leave the movie theater all cool and smart

NEXT: The 13 best lines of the nightAnd now on to the best lines:

“You’re so gay you can’t even think of real girls’ names.” –Mitchell to Cam, when Cam kept naming stars of musicals as faux ex-girlfriends.

“I want to hear all about Mitchell when he was in high school. Did he have a beard?” –Cam to Mitchell’s ex-girlfriend, Tracy (Mary Lynn Rajskub), who responded: “You’re looking at her, course I didn’t know it back then.”

“Thumpety, thump, thump, look at Frosty go.” –Cam after Tracy snubbed them

“Mitchell, I need to have my reaction.” –Cam, love his overreacting and overacting!

“Tell me about it, I’ve got a clingy fifth grader I can’t shake.” –Manny (we need some more Manny this season)

“Jay’s mind is going away. He’s so old, some nights it’s like he’s not even here.” –Gloria throwing Jay under the bus to their houseguests, after he was rude to them

“This could be my going-bald scare all over again.” –Mitchell

Cam’s response, while looking skeptically at the top of Mitchell’s (balding?) head: “Yeah, and we all know how that turned out,”

“Honey, look at how long it just took us to figure out she’s insulting us.” –Claire, having just figured out that Alex thinks that she and Phil are intellectually subpar

“Why do I have to watch a French movie? I didn’t do anything wrong.” –Phil to Claire

“Sometimes I hate the kids.” –Phil, who is being forced to watch a subtitled French movie for the good of his kids (in theory)

“While Claire watched one of the most highly acclaimed films of the year, I sat through a badly made schlockfest, with absolutely no redeeming value—and it was awesome!” –Phil, about Croctopus

“I can’t believe I fell asleep after you left. Alex is right, we’re idiots.” –Claire, after falling asleep during the subtitled film

What did you think of tonight’s episode? Do you wish there was a mini-Mitchell out there? Do you wish that 24‘s Chloe had a bigger role? Should the Syfy channel make Croctopus? And what lines did I miss that you loved?

Episode Recaps

Mitch and Cam, Modern Family
Modern Family

Parents just don’t understand… and neither do kids or spouses in this hit ensemble comedy

  • TV Show
  • 10
  • Wednesdays at 09:00 PM
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