Major gets his life together just in time for Clive to be handed a human brain.
Credit: Cate Cameron/The CW
S2 E5
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Well, if I ever have to store a human brain, this show has taught me that tupperware is the way to go.

Okay, before we get started, let me address the fact that I’m not your regular recapper, Danielle Nussbaum. I am merely a temporary substitute, but unlike Clive, I’m not new to this zombie world. So let’s recap this!

We pick up right where we left off, with Major and Liv making up for lost time with a hot makeout session that stops only when she panics that she could be — once again — turning him into a zombie. And nothing will kill a makeout like asking someone if they have open sores in their mouth. So with that, they agree to go the Pretty Woman no-kissing-on-the-mouth route. Well, that’s what Major agrees to, but Liv takes things a step further: For now, they can only be friends. (Yeah, Vivian and Edward were never “friends.”)

So with her relationship on the back burner, Liv heads off to handle the case of the week: The murder of a security guard/basketball coach who, as Ravi puts it, was “shot through the heart … and who’s to blame.”

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You all know what this means: This week, Liv is 70 percent basketball coach and 30 percent her normal self, which means she says things like “clear eyes, full stomachs, can’t lose.” But when the coach’s athletes show up with a lead — the abusive father of one of their former teammates — Liv and Clive go check it out.

Sadly, the jerk ends up having a legit alibi, but when Liv gets a vision of him beating his son, Clive pays the father a visit on his off-hours. Turns out, Clive’s got a bit of a temper when it comes to child abuse, and he makes sure this guy never lays a hand on his kid again. (Is this moment pointing to something specific for Clive? Have we ever loved him more?)

NEXT: Major shaves! (and other important stuff)

Elsewhere, Blaine’s latest zombie agrees to give him the same Utopium as the boat party in exchange for the cure, but Blaine isn’t the only one trying to figure out a formula. Over a Max Rager, the doctors can’t move forward with the Super Max recipe until they have the DNA of a functional zombie. And when the evil redhead — I refuse to use her name — suggests they ask Major for help, Major has an ask of his own: He wants a stronger tranquilizer for his zombie murders.

Speaking of Major, it seems a good pep talk from Liv is all he needed to get his life back on track. Once she tells him that he’s “Major motherflipping Lilywhite and you don’t quit,” it’s like he falls in love all over again.

And the next day, the getting-Major-on-the-right-track routine keeps moving forward when Liv brings Major in to replace Coach Mike and once again reconnect with kids. By episode’s end, Major has flushed the drugs, he’s shaved — which really wasn’t necessary in my opinion, but whatever — and he’s professed his love for Liv. “I’m a better man with you in my life,” he tells her as she asks for another shot. (DO IT, LIV.)

And although Major might claim he doesn’t care about the risks of them being together, we all know that Liv is counting the days until she can get her hands on another cure. The bad news? The tainted Utopium that’s delivered to Ravi ends up being the anti-cure. In other words, it’s an instant zombie killer. The upside of this realization is that it leads to one of my favorite scenes the show’s ever done, which involves Blaine and Ravi wrestling around trying to get their hands on the Utopium. Spoiler: Ravi manages to destroy it, but now that Blaine knows it exists, I’m sure there’s more trouble coming.

Back on the case, Clive and Liv discover that Coach Mike had started a crowdfunding campaign to get his kids to a basketball camp, which only succeeded after a random donation on the last day (otherwise known as the day Mike died). Sadly the donation was given using Bitcoin, which is untraceable. However, a new dead body is extremely traceable.

Long story short, Harry Cole, a man who worked in the building where Coach Mike was working security, owed a bit of a gambling bet to some very angry people. And when someone came to collect, he killed them. And when his co-worker — a “fixer” of sorts — offered to help him get the body out of the building, said fixer killed Mike. (All I know is that Olivia Pope would not approve.) But don’t worry, Clive gets his hands on the guilty party, and all is well.

The only other plot points still up in the air:

• Major just told evil redhead that eight of the names on the list aren’t even zombies, which isn’t going to go over well.

• Clive could find himself back in with the Meat Cute case. After implying that Suzuki could’ve shot himself, Suzuki’s wife shows up at the police station having looked through her late husband’s beer fridge. In the freezer, she found a brain.

Welcome to the party, Clive.

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