How I Met Your Mother recap: Those Legendary Nights
It’s a bird! It’s a plane! It’s…Robin safely landing a helicopter? Huh? From an emergency landing to a small olive branch, tonight’s How I Met Your Mother was a jam-packed episode filled with sex dreams, Ranjit, mariachi bands, and the omniscient Sandy Rivers. An eclectic mix, I know, so let’s start piecing together this legendary puzzle!
“How do you like living alone?” was the question Marshall posed to Ted as the episode began. And so we took a peek into what life sans roommates is like for one Ted Mosby. His first order of business? To make like a co-ed on spring break and strip! Thanks to a few strategically placed household items, we watch Mr. Mosby as he walks around in the buff. He does the laundry nude (rightfully so), then audaciously leaves the basket right in the middle of the floor. He also doesn’t have to worry about anyone eating his food, bothering him as he chows on a bucket o’ ribs, and (most vitally in this group of friends), no one is there to laugh at him when he spills said scalding soup down his chest. (Man, did that matzo ball look good.)
Now Marshall and Ted are joined by Barney and Quinn, and Barney is letting everyone within a 500-mile radius know that Quinn is a stripper, and he’s dating her, and he’s dating a stripper, and Barney is dating Quinn, who is a stripper. You get it.
Barney exits momentarily as Lily enters, excitedly telling Ted about the fancy schmancy restaurant she and Marshall have reservations for Friday night. Lily is bursting with excitement, but Marshall is looking less than enthused. We find out why when Lily heads for a pee break: “Lily had a sex dream,” says an angry Marshall, and it went a little something like this:
Earlier, Marshall was painting a baby chair (pause for me to swoon) as Lily napped on the couch. Mid-brush stroke, Lily begins moaning. It all seems innocent enough at first, until she says “Hurry up…before Marshall comes home.” And in a Looney Tunes move that seemed to ride throughout the entire episode, Marshall’s eyes practically bug out of his head as he
accidentally drops a frying pan on the floor to rouse an aroused Lily. Apparently Lily has rowdy dreams fairly frequently and usually reveals to Marshall the paramour in question. But this time the expectant mom is keeping mum on who she was romping with, and also turned a lovely shade of vermillion when questioned. In Marshall and Lily land, this means only one thing: Lily dream-banged someone they know.
Though Barney tries to take credit for being the banger in question (he has been trying to inception Lily for the past five years), Ted suggests that Robin could be the culprit. But no, Marshall says Robin was a no-show in Lily’s erotic dreamworld. How does he know? Because he and Lily went to visit Robin at the World Wide News headquarters, where Marshall strategically (and not so clandestinely) observed the hues of Lily’s face as she spoke to Robin. Her face stayed porcelain white, so Robin got crossed off the suspect list.
NEXT: The return of Sandy Rivers!
But to backtrack ever so slightly, as Lily pointedly asks Marshall what the hell he is doing getting so up close and personal with her visage at WWN, he swiftly changes the subject by pointing out a mammoth poster of Robin and Sandy Rivers that is currently occupying the wall of the reception area. I was trying to concentrate on Robin’s pathetic attempts to hide her great pleasure at being plastered on the wall, but good God, Sandy Rivers’ glaring white teeth, overly large mouth, and bewitchingly evil eyes were baring holes through my TV screen and straight into my soul. How can such an attractive man look so horrifying? The question will haunt me to my core as I lay in bed tonight…
Robin offers to show Marshall and Lily her office digs, but gets stopped by a curmudgeonly security guard who asks for some ID, despite the fact that Robin’s face is super-sized just behind him. (Also, did anyone else think their TV had frozen when voiceover Ted’s pause went on a little too long?) Speaking of Ted, Robin asks Lily and Marshall how he’s doing, and we are issued a sad reminder montage that the two have been on the outs since the I-don’t-know-how-manyth-time Ted unsuccessfully attempted to rekindle their relationship.
They tell Robin that he’s pretty good, and back at the bar, Ted is seemingly satisfied with that response. He did demolish a box of Fruit Loops just last night in the buff…but no matter, because Barney is having a piphany. Not an epiphany, THE piphany, which is that he wants to make every night from now on legendary. With those words, the weak (a.k.a. Lily and Marshall) Road Runner their way out of the bar, and the first of many ludicrous nights begin. Things kick off with:
The Night We Started a Mariachi Band – Ted and Barney don sombreros, charro outfits, mustaches, and position themselves in the center of MacLaren’s, but that was nothing compared to mañana, which brought…
The Night We Ate Everything on the Menu – Ted and Barney gorge, but that couldn’t top…
The Night We Brought A Horse Into the Bar – Exactly how it sounds, followed by…
Well, it would have been The Night We Bungee Jumped Off the Statue of Liberty, but Ted vetoed that idea when Barney turned up outside his door with bungees in hand. The would-be bungee fiasco also happened to be the night of Lily and Marshall’s highly anticipated dinner, where Marshall was pulling out all the stops, including a limo ride with New York City’s favorite driver Ranjit! The door opens, Ranjit stands outside, and…what’s that? Lily’s face turning a shade of brilliant…vermillion?! Sex dream culprit: Identified!
NEXT: Robin flies and falls from the skies
Back at WWN, Robin finds that a vending machine has been placed over her smiling, shining face and painstakingly forks over her ID as she realizes that her pretty face ain’t gonna do her much good for now. Enter Sandy Rivers, and he’s got something huge, something big, and he wants Robin on it. No, get your mind out of the gutter: It’s a breaking story for Robin that puts her in a helicopter to report on… traffic.
As Robin patrols the skies, Barney tries to entice Ted with The Night We Stole a Mummy From the Natural History Museum or The Night We Partied With the Mole People. Again, Ted is not having it. There’s only one thing left for Barney to do at this point, and he locks Ted out of his apartment. Annoyed, Ted heads to MacLaren’s to use the phone to call his superintendent.
Things aren’t getting any less awkward in the limo as Marshall is nagging Lily for the nitty gritty details of her tryst with Ranjit, while Ranjit hilariously keeps messing with the partition so he can also hear about his performance. Finally fed up with Marshall’s pestering, Lily has Ranjit pull the car over, and heads to The Lusty Leopard for some female advice from Quinn. Marshall decides to pore over his martial woes with Ranjit over dinner.
At the bar, an annoyed Ted is telling Barney that all nights can’t be legendary. “If all nights are legendary, no nights are legendary,” counters Ted in all his brilliance. Barney, referencing his Game of Life point system, doesn’t care.
Back in the sky, Robin is expressing her work frustration to the helicopter pilot, but as he’s about to instill his sage wisdom upon her, he has a stroke, leaving a stricken Robin pilot-less above the streets of New York. Down below, all eyes are on the stranded anchor. Ted and Barney anxiously watch news updates from the bar, Quinn and Lily hold each other at The Lusty Leopard, and Marshall watches the news unfold from his phone at the restaurant.
There was never any doubt whether Robin would make it out okay, but I was curious how this little freak mishap would play out. Not only did Robin land the helicopter safely with instructions from the ground, but she also gained the instant fame she’d been looking for (admit it, that Scherbatsky sandwich looked pretty damn good), and best of all, that vending machine was pushed over to cover Sandy’s face instead. As news of her safety spread, Robin was inundated by calls from all her friends and family. But would she get one from Ted? I really wasn’t sure. At the last minute, a text appeared: I know we’re not talking right now…but I just want you to know…I’m glad you’re okay. It was from Ted, and a small ray of hope appeared that these two were heading down the road to friendship again.
Two other revelations before we go: Marshall realizes Lily’s sex dream was about Ranjit because Lily is attracted to great dads, and Barney discloses that the real reason he’s been trying to make nights legendary is so his poor, lovelorn self won’t have to think about what Quinn is doing at work. There is just so much love in the How I Met Your Mother air!
So, Mother mavens, thoughts on tonight’s episode? Were you tickled pink to see Marshall holding a color wheel? Did you have any doubts that Ted would reach out to Robin? With three episodes left of the season, how will it all end?! Let’s discuss in the comments below.
“The only person we’re calling is everyone we know because tonight’s “The Night We Tracked Down Phil Collins, became best friends with him, and talked him into reuniting with Peter Gabriel, so then we got to sing back-up on the new Genesis album and it was awesome.” –Barney
Quinn: And I should go. Time to make the doughnuts.
Barney: Ha, more like time to make some dough, sitting on some nuts. She’s a stripper. I’m dating her. Barney wins.
Barney: Okay, you’ve caught me Vermillion-handed. The truth is, I’ve spent the last five years trying to Inception your wife.
Marshall: That movie only came out two years ago.
Barney: What movie?
Barney: I was sitting at home last night and I had a Piphany!
Ted: Actually it’s epiphany.
Barney: No Ted, this is THE piphany.
Ranjit: Should I take the West Side Highway?
Marshall: Why not, Ranjit? Don’t you always just take whatever you want regardless of anything but your own dirty, sick, twisted appetites?
Ranjit: I’ll just stay on Broadway.
Ted, Robin, Barney, Marshall, and Lilly remind us all of the joy of slap bets