Whitney's brief presentation fails to impress the staff at the magazine's home office; plus, Lauren and Brody and Spencer go on and on about their love/hate triangle

By Lindsay Soll
October 30, 2007 at 04:00 AM EDT
Jeff Lipsky
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”The Hills” recap: Whitney’s New York moment

How many of you were annoyed at all of the buzz last week about how fake The Hills is? (In case you forgot, there was the Great Nail Polish Debacle of 2007, and then of course the Gavin Tells All Exposé.) When I say annoyed, I don’t mean that you were shocked by the news that MTV producers do just that — produce scenes — but annoyed at how utterly ridiculous and artificial the show has become. Believe me, I’m well aware a lot of these scenes have to be planned. (How else would you explain why there’s always a cameraman conveniently in Brody’s car every time Lauren calls him? And what really were the odds that Speidi would’ve ended up at the very same restaurant as Lauren and Jason?) I will even freely admit that part of what I love about The Hills is how absurd it is sometimes. (I mean, when else is it okay for a guy to spray-paint the word ”Hollywood” on his living room wall?)

Given all that, it was somewhat of a nice break to see Lauren and Whitney actually doing something relevant (a.k.a. their jobs) in tonight’s episode. Granted work on The Hills usually equals boring nothingness, but this time we actually got to see Whitney do something besides fold clothes. Lisa Love gave her the task of finding a location for Teen Vogue‘s Young Hollywood Party, and I thought she did a pretty nice job of it. The venue she picked out was fitting for the event. The dress she wore to present her plans to the New York office, on the other hand, was not. True, Teen Vogue is a fashion magazine (it’s not like she was giving a speech to the fine folks at Field and Stream or anything), but the outfit was a tad too skimpy for the occasion. Whitney even said, ”I don’t think I would ever wear this into the office at home. It’s just like a whole different world out here.” I?m guessing by ”different world,” she meant that N.Y.C. is a lot less laid-back and casual than L.A. Luckily, Whitney and her dress pulled through in the meeting — at least according to Lisa Love. I, however, was sure she bombed, judging by the eye rolls and confused stares on the faces of the East Coast team (especially editor in chief Amy Astley).

I’m still wondering, though, what the point was in sending Whitney out to New York. She could have just as easily e-mailed pictures. Don’t get me wrong: It was a nice change of scenery from Hollywood, but we didn’t even get to see Whitney and Lauren go out on the town at night (which we all know they definitely did). Also, was it necessary for Lauren to accompany Whitney? She didn’t even get to help out with the presentation but instead was sent to work at a casting for a Marc by Marc Jacobs show. (Not that I’m downplaying how cool it would’ve been to shake hands with the designer himself, but doesn’t he have his own interns to do his scut work?) Oh, and what was up with Lauren getting in a cab to get to the Marc Jacobs showroom and announcing, ”I’m in a hurry!” Do reality stars think that cabs can clear traffic just for them?

At the end of their ”business trip,” Lauren was acting eager to get back to L.A. ”Happy to go home….I miss Brody,” she said to Whitney while donning a random white gangster-looking hat before they headed to JFK. This of course made me wonder: Did she really — I mean really — miss Mr. Jenner? Or was it just some stupid ploy meant to further a story line that I know I’d be happy to see fizzle? Okay, so Brody does have his charming moments (like at the end of the episode, when he was chatting with Lauren on her couch and he said, ”So listen, I think there’s too many pillows in between us. Maybe just, you know, come give me a hug or something.”) But I’m still not ready to join his fan club. Setting aside everything we know (meaning from the gossip blogs and tabloids), if these two were really meant to be together, couldn’t they please just make it happen already? If not, could MTV please hire another boy for Lauren to crush on and/or have drunken make-out sessions with? It would be much appreciated.

NEXT: Guy love gone bad

Speidi had very little face time in this episode (for once), except for the small drama over Spencer running into Frankie outside of the Bolthouse offices, which, if anything, did help us finally solve the mystery over how Frankie actually fits into the group. Apparently, he works for Brent Bolthouse at the ever-popular Area nightclub on Saturdays, and I also recently learned from the E! show Keeping Up With the Kardashians (yup, Brody and Kim are step-siblings) that Frankie is Brody’s manager. Not exactly sure what he ”manages,” so for now, I’ll just chalk that title up as a nicer way of saying ”sidekick.” Frankie complained to Beavis (no facial hair!) about not getting a return call after he and Brody wished Spencer a happy birthday. In his defense, Spencer said, ”With Brody and I, it’s as simple as this: I’ve been Brody’s loyal best friend for so many years. I’ve defended him, I’ve fought for him. Then he started hanging out with L.C., who all she does is bash my name, try to tear up my relationship with Heidi, all these things, right?” If you ignore the grammatical errors in that sentence, Spencer did sound somewhat sincere when he said it — and not as robotic as he usually does when he opens his mouth. So sincere, in fact, that he was even persuaded by Frankie to give Brody another chance. Only Brody later told Lauren he has no intention of reuniting with his old pal. ”I love Spencer, but I don’t think I can ever look at him the same — ever. I just don’t ever think that we’ll be best friends again, you know?”

Side note: I might be hallucinating, but right before Brody discussed Spencer’s phone call with Lauren, she asked him (or, well, her voice did, off camera), ”So you okay? What’s going on?” And I swear, literally swear, that it was Whitney’s voice and not Lauren’s. Seriously, when you get a chance, go back to your DVR or log onto mtv.com, fast-forward to 27 minutes into the episode, and tell me whether or not I’m right. Oddly enough, if I am, it just proves my earlier point that our show’s editing has gotten a little too obvious.

Until next week, TV Watchers, let me know your thoughts: Did you find this actionless episode as dull as I did? Do you think Brody was serious about not ever calling Spencer back? Or do you think they’ll actually forgive each other one day? Are you as over the whole Lauren and Brody relationship idea as I am? Finally, what kind of problems do you foresee happening at the Young Hollywood Party next week?

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