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Halloween brings a ton of tricks and very few treats to Grey Sloan. And the other hospital. (Welcome to the recap intro, Pac North.) With zombie brides and cheerful sunflowers roaming the halls, who knows what’s going to happen to all the sick people and pregnant women on this lively medical drama.

GREY’S ANATOMY – “Whistlin’ Past the Graveyard” – Alex is hoping to impress investors at Pac-Gen North, but when he hears disturbing news about skeletons on the construction site grounds, he enlists Richard to help with distraction tactics. Teddy feels the pressure to be super-mom after tasking herself with creating original Halloween costumes for Allison and Leo, while Meredith fears she won’t make it home in time for trick-or-treating with her kids. Elsewhere, Jackson tends to a pediatric patient who is upset she is spending her Halloween in a hospital on “Grey’s Anatomy,” THURSDAY, OCT. 31 (8:00-9:01 p.m. EDT), on ABC. (ABC/Jessica Brooks)CHANDRA WILSON
| Credit: Jessica Brooks/ABC

Trick No. 1
Although she’s in a bright orange jumpsuit, Meredith’s costume is not a jailbird with great hair. She’s supposed to get out of the clink right this minute, but the paperwork is stuck a the courthouse. Meredith has every right to whine, right?

Perhaps. But when her cellmate shares her own personal story, Meredith realizes that her life isn’t so bad compared to the single mom who desperately misses her kids, so she channels her energy into jigsaw puzzles.

Meredith finally gets to come home. To no ones’s surprise, she pays the woman’s bail so she can be with her own children on Halloween. And when Maggie and Amelia huddle around during her homecoming to discuss Meredith’s next steps, they learn that their sister is super chill with whatever happens. Because family first. It looks like part of Meredith’s soul is back in prison.

Trick No. 2
Alex is killing it with potential investors over at Pac North. In ironic news, the location of his future hospital wing is being built over a bunch of human bones. Apparently, Pac North used to be a mental hospital and when families didn’t come to claim deceased patients’ bodies, attendees just dug a big hole and dumped corpses into the ground.

This explains why Pac North is semi-haunted and weird.

While Weber tries to divert the line of potential investors into other areas of the hospital, Owen, Alex, and his zombie bride Jo (in full awesome makeup, complete with bloody dress) try to calm the chaos. Multiple patients are suffering from cardiac arrests at the same time.

It’s the curse! Or it’s the fact that they all received the bad blood from the same broken refrigerator? Either way, Jo helps save the day, and because Alex was upfront (sort of) with the investors, he still gets the money. He and Jo celebrate by getting married again at the courthouse. I, for one, am happy that Jo’s “I’m pregnant” declaration was just a joke. I don’t think we, the viewer, or the staff at Grey Sloan could handle three pregnant women.

Trick No. 3
Link invites Amelia to meet his mom and dad as they celebrate his cancer-versary. (That’s the day his scans came back clean.) There’s one quick caveat: His parents hate each other. The best way to handle that situation is to sit in silence and wait for the 15 minutes to pass before one of them ups and leaves.

Amelia proves she is the worst with parents. But instead of freaking out at Amelia’s random inappropriate babbling, we learn that Link’s mom is getting remarried. To a guy she met on a dating app. Who’s the guy you ask? Link’s dad, of course!

This is good news, right? Wrong. Link isn’t having it. He’s spent way too long trying to cope with his parents’ split and is now used to the fighting. He will not be treated like a pawn again, and in the middle of all his shouting, Link drops the bomb that they are going to be grandparents. Surprise!

Amelia quickly figures out that Link is more upset that his mom and dad made Link’s cancer-versary all about them. Things escalate when his parents tell them they will be married the exact weekend the baby is born. Luckily, they drink up their future-grandparent endorphins and offer to move their wedding to whenever’s most convenient for the happy, non-married couple.

Trick No. 4
Teddie gives Bailey some valuable pregnant advice. When she feels like the hormones are going to get the best of her, she just needs to put her tongue to the roof of her mouth and look up. I’d like all the women reading this who are with child to let me know if this works. Thank you.

Bailey’s waterworks cease when an ambulance rolls in with a hatchet hanging out of a bloody kid’s gut. Spoiler: The hatchet and blood are fake, but the injury is real. He was run over by a car. Ouch. As Teddie and Bailey save his life, they discuss the proper way to be hardworking mothers who deal with Halloween costumes and trick-or-treating.

Koracick pipes in every once in a while, bashing Halloween. Kids getting sick of eating too much candy. Teeth rotting out of heads. People being hit by cars not paying attention. Bailey chastises him for being a Halloween Grinch.

Koracick’s face changes and he shares a story with Bailey. His son loved Halloween and dressing up. It was a thing they did together. But his son died two weeks before Halloween and there’s a cloud that hangs over Oct. 31.

Bailey’s mouth twitches, she rolls her eyes to the heavens, and wills herself to not cry. It doesn’t work and Koracick ends up comforting the weeping woman with raging hormones. It was a sweet moment between mortal enemies.

Trick No. 5
Avery, DeLuca, and Schmidt care for a little girl named Mary Rose who has a rare disorder that keeps her from being in the sun. She has terrible burns on her arms and her parents have no idea what happened.

Avery determines that Mary Rose will have to have surgery. This makes the girl deeply depressed because she wants to trick-or-treat. Avery promises a very cool Halloween party right there in the hospital after she’s out of surgery. Then he whispers to Schmidt that he has to cobble one together in the next few hours. Fun times.

After surgery, Avery prompts Mary Rose to confess what happened to her arms. She refuses, claiming she only wants to talk to Dr. Alex. So Avery does his best Alex Karev impression and finds out that the girl ran outside to chase her cat. That’s when she burned herself. You should know she’s good now. The impression was not.

Schmidt is successful in his Halloween party. He even makes a sunflower costume for a little boy and posts all sorts of pictures on social media with Nico, even though his mother asked he keep his relationship offline. It’s called growth, people, and I’m glad to see Schmidt isn’t dropping his glasses in open abdomens anymore.

Finally, DeLuca tracks down Zola, who went to the OR gallery to read her book. She’s been moody and snapped at DeLuca that very morning when he tried to help her fix her butterfly wings. DeLuca finally figures out that Zola is not mad at him. She’s grieving her father. She’s afraid she’s forgetting him.

DeLuca endears himself to everyone watching by telling Zola that Derek Shepherd is a legend and will never be forgotten. AMEN! He then goes on to “tell her the stories” about all of the wonderful things Dr. Shepherd did in that very hospital.

If you need me, I’ll be over here with my tongue on the roof of my mouth, looking toward the heavens, trying not to cry. Thank you.

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