Hell hath no fury like a former evictee scorned

By Justin Kirkland
August 08, 2016 at 01:39 AM EDT
CBS

Big Brother

S18 E22
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“Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.” —The Puerto Rican Sensation

Okay, so that’s actually a Confucius quote, but for all intents and purposes, it works in reference to Victor and his pursuit of revenge. Big Brother is a complicated game — one that takes more than just a split-second decision, and it gets even more complicated when you’ve been eliminated and brought back into the house that put you out. So for Victor, he has to walk lightly…and by walk, I mean swing. Because when we last saw the houseguests, they were swinging and spinning in pursuit of Head of Household.

In reality, we were left with houseguests spinning on another endurance competition, and Michelle and Zakiyah are over it — specifically, they’re over how the entire house voted out Da’Vonne, didn’t tell them it was coming, and are just letting them hang out on the outside of the majority. James and Bridgette are the first to fall, but James is fine with it because he doesn’t feel in danger. Bridgette doesn’t mind because she’s never really been interested in being in charge of her own game anyway. Corey rounds out the have-nots for the week, leaving five houseguests in the game.

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As the minutes pass, the spinning gets to Michelle and she voms REAL hard. It’s like bodily fluid spin art. She cries because she’s eliminated and because she threw up and because someone will have to clean it up. As the competition drags on, Nicole and Paulie and Zakiyah drop, leaving Natalie (huh, random) and Victor (does he have an alliance?), who apparently are only in this for the letter from their moms. But after almost two hours of competition, Victor outlasts Natalie to claim HOH and do who knows what. I mean, the man made it clear — he was voted out 9-1, so he has absolutely no allegiance to anyone. Except Paulie, apparently, who announces he can control Victor’s decision.

NEXT: Don’t cry for Meech, Argentina

It appears Paulie’s arrogance is starting to catch up to him, because when he approaches Zakiyah after the competition he threw (immediately after her falling, mind you), she is NOT up for his advances. Zakiyah and Michelle are both feeling pretty ostracized, but they know it’s essentially out of their hands for now. And they’re right, because for Victor to be such a maverick, he immediately turns over the information Da’Vonne whispered to him (“they” were going after him during a double eviction) as she was leaving. No worries, though; he’s decided he’s going to trust his boys, Paul and Paulie. Oh. Great.

But back to Meech and Z. In short, they’re falling apart. When Nicole comes to talk to Michelle, pretty much all she can do is cry. Nicole apologizes a lot and tells Michelle she loves her, but it’s kind of too little, too late — Nicole helped eliminate her ally and didn’t even give her a heads up. Paulie somehow manages to convince Zakiyah to talk to him and then manages to convince her she’s not a target. But that’s what the Board does. What’s the Board, you ask? It’s the inner circle of the Executives (Paul, Corey, Victor, Paulie, and James) that consists of Paul, Victor, and Paulie.

Guess who’s not in the Board or the Executives? Michelle…partially because she’s a woman, but also because she’s having a full-on emotional breakdown. She calls out James for leaving her out, and all of a sudden, the biggest target is on Michelle’s head. And Michelle’s emotional downfall comes at the worst time, because the man on whom she just exacted her emotional spiral is the same guy who just got America’s Care Package. This week, James gets to decide which two houseguests’ votes are nullified. My guess is he’s not going to throw Michelle a bone.

As the houseguests gather for the nomination ceremony, it’s as if the decision has already been made. Zakiyah’s face pops up on the memory wall, followed quickly by Michelle’s. Not even a vomit-mid-comp performance could save Michelle. But you know what makes it sting even worse? Victor lights in on the darkest nomination speech to date this season. He calls upon his 9-1 vote and how it felt to be up on eviction night. He then turns to Zakiyah to say that if she had her way, he’d be nominated…and that outside of Paulie, she has no interest in him. As for Michelle? To quote Victor, “Yesterday wasn’t the day to piss someone off.” LORD. And that’s what happens when you don’t invite Regina George to your party.

Episode Recaps

So what are your thoughts? Was Victor too harsh? Do you feel bad for either Zakiyah or Michelle, and do you think Paulie has a chance of flipping Victor’s plan and nixing Michelle? I’m still feeling so uncomfortable that I’m going into the Diary Room myself to cry about it.

Big Brother

Julie Chen hosts as the houseguests battle it out.

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