Ali Goldstein/NBC

30 Rock

S5 E5
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TV Show
October 22, 2010 at 11:37 AM EDT

On this week’s 30 Rock, “Reaganing,” Lemon had a brand new pair of rollerskates, and Jack had a brand new key…to get rid of her sexual hangups! With Greece playing Pakistan in soccer, Lemon couldn’t get a cab to the Newark airport in order to break up with Carol. No problem: Jack has a driver and had been on a winning streak for the past 24 hours. He was Reaganing, you see. It’s like Lizzing, for grownups.

With Tracy holding up production on a Boys and Girls Club commercial shoot, the Reaganer and his protege had plenty of time to dive into Lemon’s sexual abyss to figure out why she found “the beast with two backs” so horrible. At first she resisted, telling Jack she simply didn’t want to be some oversexed New York nympho like those sluts on…Everybody Loves Raymond. BUT WHY, Lemon?

Inoventually, the truth came out: When she was 9, Lemon was found by her mom, squirming under a Tom Jones poster with her underpants around her ankles. The little roller-skating Pete Rose (not Dorothy Hamill) just desperately needed to go the bathroom. “It didn’t look good, Jack.” Her mom took away Tom Jones, along with other treasured posters — among them some Phillies crushes, Han Solo, and Kermit. Conclusion: SEX MAKES THE PEOPLE GO AWAY.

I loved that an episode devoted to Lemon being “the sexual equivalent of a million Hindenburgs” brought us so many flashbacks…from previous episodes! That’s how pathetic/awesome this character is! I think “The word lovers bums me out, unless it’s between meat and pizza will always be my favorite.

Meanwhile, Jenna — the Dina Lohan of Studio 6H — got a coveted “free ice cream for life” black card at Carvel and enlisted Kenneth to help her with the “short grift” of exchanging misspelled cakes for cash. But Jenna grew restless and came up a long con. Enter Kelsey Grammer, who was obviously hanging around and up for anything. “Long grift, huh? Now. Who are ya and what are we doing?” He was great. I wouldn’t mind watching a spinoff about Jenna and Kelsey opening a medical supply store in Florida, then getting some Social Security numbers, “through seduction.” Of course, Jenna needs to stay put so she and Kenneth can keep adding brick after brick to their friendship castle ’til it someday reaches to the sky.

NEXT: The episode’s 10 best lines!

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Tina Fey, Alec Baldwin, and Tracy Morgan star in the Emmy-winning comedy. You want to go to there.
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