Your Pop Culture Horoscope for September
Your Entertainment Forecast
Hello, September! Only a few days left of Mercury retrograde, but that doesn’t mean you should let yourself get sloppy come Sept. 5 — it will still be Virgo season, after all. We’ve made it through the summer, and now it’s time to get serious about pop culture as the first rounds of Oscar hopefuls and fall TV pilots hit this month. How to navigate all your options? Consult the cosmos, of course. Find your pop culture horoscopes for September ahead!
We may be entering fall, but somehow it’s always bright springtime for you, isn’t it, Aries? After spending the summer zipping around town blasting “Malibu” with the top down (even if your car isn’t a convertible, somehow you always drive with the top down), this month you’ll be grooving to the latest from a fellow fire sign and youthful spirit, Sagittarius Miley Cyrus. Her album (Sept. 29) is even called Younger Now! That’s just who you are!
While you might not always be amused by Aquarians’ unpredictability, make an exception and give Gucci Mane a chance this September, Taurus. You’ll certainly appreciate his work ethic: the rapper’s next album, Mr. Davis (which comes just a few months after May’s DropTopWop), drops Sept. 15, followed almost immediately by his memoir, The Autobiography of Gucci Mane (Sept. 19), much of which he wrote in prison. And what a story! The trap artist’s persistence in the face of extreme obstacles, and his determination to transform himself and right his wrongs, make him an Aquarius after your own heart.
Considering your tongue has pretty much established permanent residence inside your cheek, Gemini, it should come as no surprise that you’re going to take genuine delight in American Vandal (Sept. 15), Netflix’s mockumentary series in which an amateur teen documentarian seeks to expose the truth behind a heinous crime committed at his school: the spray-painting of a bunch of d---s on cars. At last, a true crime series you can really get behind!
We know, Cancer, it can be hard to let go. Lucky for you, the hip new thing in TV is making sure nobody ever really has to. You’re all about the upcoming Will & Grace revival (Sept. 28) and can’t wait to see what new hijinks they’ve dreamed up for that familiar foursome. Honey, your heart will just about explode.
Your birthday has come and gone, and we know you’re having a difficult time relinquishing the spotlight, dearest Leo. But there’s nothing like a little jolt of competition to put the spring back in your step, so good thing Battle of the Sexes hits theaters Sept. 22! If you like watching crusty old chauvinists get publicly corrected (and you know you do), you’ll thrill at Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris’ film adaptation of the 1973 tennis match between Billie Jean King (Emma Stone) and Bobby Riggs (Steve Carell). Game on!
Jane Campion, steady Taurus that she is, would never forget you on your birthday, Virgo, and she’s got something very special for you this season. You’ve probably spent the last four years obsessing over the first season of Campion’s superior Top of the Lake, and now, finally, just in time for your birthday, it’s back with a second installment, China Girl (Sept. 10). The meticulously crafted series adds Nicole Kidman and Gwendoline Christie to its cast for part two, which screened at Cannes earlier this year to great acclaim. Get ready to go to town picking this mystery apart, Virgo. You should never have to settle on your birthday.
Here’s a bit of symmetry to satisfy even the most exacting of scales: Dame Judi Dench’s first-ever lead role in a film (for which she earned her first-ever Oscar nomination) was playing Queen Victoria in 1997’s Mrs. Brown; now, 20 years later, she’s donning the mourning dress yet again to play the monarch a second time in Stephen Frears’ Victoria and Abdul (Sept. 22), about the queen’s famous friendship with Abdul Karim (Ali Fazal), a young Indian Muslim man in her service. Don’t you just love finding friends in unexpected places?
This has been a difficult year for everyone, but perhaps for none so much as you, Scorpio. It’s been almost 10 months now since Hillary Clinton, a brilliant and determined fellow scorpion, lost an un-losable fight to a Gemini—a Gemini!—and the only thing that's distracted you from obsessing over the shocking 2016 election is the increasingly outrageous news cycle that's rolled out in the aftermath. This month, with the release of Clinton’s new book, you’ll get to the bottom of it. You’ll find out, straight from one of your own, exactly What Happened (Sept. 12).
The Wire creator David Simon is back on HBO with a new drama, a few cities north of Baltimore this time. The Deuce (Sept. 10) dramatizes the legalization of porn in New York in the ‘70s, wherein James Franco does double duty as a pair of mustachioed twins and Maggie Gyllenhaal plays a sex worker who finds employment in the new industry. “There’s been a change in the law, something about community standards,” one character says in the trailer. “Apparently, New York has none.” Sex, grit, and lawless vintage New York? If that’s not pure Sagittarian entertainment, we have no idea what is.
We would never accuse you of espousing the philosophy that “greed is good,” Capricorn, but we would also never say that it’s totally out of the question that Gordon Gekko was born under your sign. Oliver Stone’s Wall Street turns 30 this year, and you’ll throw it back to the ‘80s this September by taking in an anniversary screening (Sept. 24) of the cautionary classic, which will delight and disturb you in equal measure.
Mike McCormack’s singular Solar Bones, which was released to great acclaim in Ireland last year and hits shelves stateside Sept. 12, is a heady rumination on modern life as otherworldly as it is grounded in reality—all of which water bearers like yourself will find profoundly fascinating. But guess what else? The entire novel, a 224-page tome, takes the form of one single long sentence—yes, Aquarius, that’s right! A book written exactly the way you think!
When the going gets tough, you sweet fishes of the zodiac get the heck outta town—mentally, anyway. After a rough summer, you want to detach a little bit and let your imagination run wild. Enter M.T. Anderson’s Landscape with Invisible Hand (Sept. 12), about aliens who land on Earth, bringing scientific advancements we can only dream about but wanting nothing more than retro human pop culture. Be warned, though, Pisces, if you’re looking for pure escapism—there might be more than a little bit of truth hiding beneath that whimsical premise.