10 great teen-movie house parties, from too-real to surreal

It's simple math: Cram a bunch of adolescents into an empty house and add alcohol, along with the knowledge that the taste of unchaperoned freedom will be over almost as soon as it began, and the stakes shoot up higher than the valedictorian's GPA. We've revisited 10 teen-movie celebrations—the cautionary, the aspirational, and everywhere in between—and judged how accurately they capture the high school experience. Rated on a scale of one (absolutely outlandish) to five (so real it hurts), see how these big-screen bashes rate.

THE INVITE: Cady's (Lindsay Lohan) parents are gone and her quest to destroy Regina George (Rachel McAdams) continues when she hosts a "small get-together"—and doesn't invite the deposed queen bee.

THE JAMS: "Fire (Yes, Yes Y'all)," Joe Budden feat. Busta Rhymes

THE DRAMA: Cady misses Janis' (Lizzy Caplan) art show to host the doomed gathering, which soon attracts an enormous crowd of people she doesn't know. Gretchen (Lacey Chabert) gets drunk and then confronts (and makes out with) Jason (Daniel DeSanto). Cady finally has a conversation with a disenchanted Aaron Samuels (Jonathan Bennett), only to be interrupted by Regina, prompting Cady to get sick. Finally, to make matters worse, Cady is wearing an awful dress in color-blocked black and pink, despite it not being a Wednesday.

TOO REAL? Like so much of Mean Girls, Cady's chaotic party is realer than anything that's ever actually happened, heightened to unpleasant levels of disaster and humiliation to really get to the heart of a teen party gone wrong. And isn't "word vomit followed by actual vomit" a pretty good metaphor for (or even just a straight description of) how a lot of bad nights can feel?

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: Bogey Lowenstein's (Kyle Cease) perfectly civilized wine and cheese party for Padua High School's future MBAs gets crashed by the entire student body after Michael (David Krumholtz), recently ousted from the group due to a ludicrous rumor that he buys his Izods at an outlet mall, distributes a flyer advertising a raging house party. Payback, baby!

THE JAMS: "Hypnotize," The Notorious B.I.G.; "Atomic Dog," George Clinton

THE DRAMA: Cameron (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) loves Bianca (Larisa Oleynik)! Bianca loves Joey (Andrew Keegan)! Joey loves himself! Kat (Julia Stiles) loves nobody! Patrick (Heath Ledger) loves money! So, Kat gets trashed, dances on a table, and throws up on a swing set. Patrick won't kiss Kat, but Bianca kisses Cameron (in the car). Meanwhile, Joey's a bore and Michael can't flirt. In short: It's just a party, and hell is just a sauna.

TOO REAL? In the practical sense, not so much. Only in our teen movie dreams does one clearly shady FREE BEER flier attract such a huge, oddly punctual crowd to such a huge, suspiciously party-ready house. But, emotionally speaking, so much of the 10 Things bash hits home, from Cameron's heartbreak to Kat's general discontent to Bianca's slow realization that she's chosen the wrong guy. All the teenagers being deeply frustrated and having no idea what to do about it? That's one thing we know to be true.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: It's the night before graduation—party at Nick's (Mason Gooding) house! The whole senior class has been invited, and approximately 500 pizzas have been ordered. Just try not to get stuck at weird side parties on the way.

THE JAMS: "You Oughta Know," Alanis Morissette; "Slip Away," Perfume Genius

THE DRAMA: Time for overachieving BFFs Amy (Kaitlyn Dever) and Molly (Beanie Feldstein) to make up for four years of abstaining from the company of their classmates—let the last-minute revelations begin! Molly is much better at beer pong than Nick would have guessed; Amy has a pleasant (if slightly pitchy) singing voice, much to George's (Noah Galvin) surprise; Hope (Diana Silvers) isn't the mean girl Amy always took her for; and Triple A (Molly Gordon, but please don't call her that) is really not so bad, Molly realizes. And that's not to mention who makes out with whom! Most surprising of all, though, is what Molly and Amy discover about each other. Isn't that always how it goes?

TOO REAL? Um, hello, it's the night before graduation. There is no tomorrow, and that urgency is as real as it gets. The stakes were never so high, the crushes never so crushing, the compliment of someone seeing you for your true Hogwarts House affiliation never so, so gratifying. One final badass party-savior move from one of our heroines, however, just might begin to enter the territory of a high school fantasy.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: Bram's (Keiynan Lonsdale) parents are out of town on Halloween, so, you know what that means: house party! This is a friendly, feel-good teen movie, so everyone's invited.

THE JAMS: "Feel It Still," Portugal. The Man; "Monster Mash," Bobby "Boris" Pickett and the Crypt-Kickers

THE DRAMA: Poor Simon (Nick Robinson)! Between fending off his blackmailer (Logan Miller's Martin, who's threatened to out the closeted teen), trying to identify his anonymous pen pal "Blue," and manipulating his friends to appease the former and remain ignorant of the latter, he's got his hands full. The only thing to do is imbibe copious amounts of alcohol and sing your heart out to some Bieber karaoke.

TOO REAL? I mean, sort of. Our heroes get too drunk, yes. They pine for each other, tell lies to each other, and uncover truths about each other, yes. But it all goes down so gently that it's like teen partying with training wheels (and with too-polished Halloween costumes, the halfhearted Cristiano Ronaldo notwithstanding). The most legit part has to be after Simon and his best friend Leah (Katherine Langford) get back to his house (before curfew!) and she says the party "felt like I was watching it from across the room." Yes! Redeemed by the angst!

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: More out-of-town parents means more drunken debauchery in an empty, spacious, and well-appointed suburban home. All the teens need is some booze, but, luckily for everyone, the dorkiest member of a trio of nerds recently obtained a fake ID—just call him McLovin.

THE JAMS: "Here I Come," The Roots; "I'm Your Boogie Man," KC and the Sunshine Band

THE DRAMA: Best friends Evan (Michael Cera) and Seth (Jonah Hill) are trying to score with Becca (Martha MacIsaac) and Jules (Emma Stone), but Becca gets way too drunk to sleep with Evan and Jules doesn't drink at all, a possibility for which Seth did not prepare. Meanwhile, Fogell/McLovin (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) charms Nicola (Aviva Baumann) on the dance floor, somehow, only to be c--kblocked by his new cop friends.

TOO REAL? The heavy drinking to ease sexual anxiety and consequent mismatched levels of intoxication, ultimately precluding any actual sexual satisfaction? That's legit. The girls' shopping list of hard lemonade and gimmicky vodka? Very legit. Everything that ever happens, throughout the entire movie, involving McLovin? Not so much.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: Ugh, a Valley party. As Cher (Alicia Silverstone) rightly points out, the cops usually break them up in less than an hour and it takes that long to get there. Worth a cameo, though.

THE JAMS: "Rollin' With the Homies," Coolio

THE DRAMA: Cher is in full matchmaker mode, working overtime to facilitate the pairing of adorably clueless Tai (Brittany Murphy) and totally popular Elton (Jeremy Sisto). Unfortunately, for the girls, however, Elton has Cher herself in his sights, and unfairly exploits his position next to her during an otherwise perfectly wholesome game of Suck and Blow. Meanwhile, Murray (Donald Faison) shaves his head, prompting Dionne (Stacey Dash) to make her play for Best Dramatic Actress at a Val Party.

TOO REAL? Um, as if! We love you, Cher, but even your trashy house parties make us wonder, 'Is this, like, a Noxzema commercial, or what?' I mean, what teenage girl has a wardrobe full of Alaïa dresses? And then wears one of them to a party in the Valley, of all places?

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: Post-prom party at Stifler's (Seann William Scott) house on the lake! This is the night we've been waiting for! Why else have we been friends with Stifler all this time?

THE JAMS: "Mrs. Robinson," Simon & Garfunkel

THE DRAMA: The night has arrived. Our quartet of heroes shall fulfill their pact and be virgins no more. Kevin (Thomas Ian Nicholas) finally sleeps with his girlfriend Vicky (Tara Reid). Oz (Chris Klein), having gotten in touch with his sensitive side, makes sweet love to choir girl Heather (Mena Suvari). Jim (Jason Biggs) is surprised to find that his geeky date Michelle (Alyson Hannigan) has more on her mind than band camp stories, and Finch (Eddie Kaye Thomas) retroactively justifies the rumor that he had an affair with an older woman by seducing Stifler's mom (Jennifer Coolidge) on a pool table.

TOO REAL? A prom party in which everyone gets just what they hoped for sounds sweet as pie…and a little sweeter than high school reality. The fact that they all get it in ways they never could have anticipated, though, rings true—Stifler's mom notwithstanding.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: When Play's (Christopher Martin) parents are away, the teenagers will, well, play. After Kid (Christopher Reid) gets into a fight at school, his dad (Robin Harris) doesn't want him to go, but it's going to take more than some paternal threats to keep Kid from this party.

THE JAMS: "Ain't My Type of Hype," Full Force; "Always and Forever," Heatwave

THE DRAMA: Kid and Play have a dance-off with Sidney (Tisha Campbell) and Sharane (the late A.J. Johnson), and then a rap battle with each other. Kid's dad comes to the door. Kid's bullies come to the door. Kid flirts with Sharane, despite preferring Sidney, in an effort to cultivate multiple options. Sharane does the same, even though she doesn't really care about anyone. Sidney watches all of it, sadly.

TOO REAL? The emotional confusion and competitive flirtation strike a chord, but we could only dream that most high school parties featured dance-offs and rap battles up to this standard. Let's not even get to Kid's ongoing evasion of the bullies, or the details of his brief stint in jail.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉 

THE INVITE: Congratulations to the senior class of Huntington Hillside High! As the news spreads like wildfire that Mike Dexter (Peter Facinelli) dumped Amanda Beckett (Jennifer Love Hewitt), so does the invite: Molly Stinson's house. Graduation night.

THE JAMS: "Can't Get Enough of You Baby," Smash Mouth; "Paradise City," Guns N' Roses

THE DRAMA: Preston's (Ethan Embry) been in love with Amanda since freshman year. Now's his chance, and if Barry Manilow on the radio isn't a sign, then what is? Amanda is wondering what her identity is when it isn't "Mike Dexter's girlfriend," and William (Charlie Korsmo) wants revenge for years of Mike's torment. Upstairs, Kenny is going to have sex if it's the last thing he does, but finds himself locked in a bathroom with Denise (Lauren Ambrose), who never wanted to be at this party in the first place.

TOO REAL? Only in the moments when we're reminded that the whole thing is just a booze-soaked tableau of people wondering who they're going to be now that the last four years are over. (Not so much in the moments when a couple of nerds scheme on the poolhouse rooftop or when an angel stripper takes pity on Preston because she once had a crush on Scott Baio.) "Maybe it was a hero's trial," Preston says, believing all hope is lost. "It would have been cool to make out with her, though." Ah, the sweet poetry of adolescence.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉 🎉

THE INVITE: Thomas' (Thomas Mann) birthday happens to coincide with his parents' anniversary. They leave for the weekend. Thomas has a little party.

THE JAMS: "W.T.P.," Eminem; "Pursuit of Happiness," Kid Cudi; "Heads Will Roll (A-Trak remix)," Yeah Yeah Yeahs

THE DRAMA: "We wanna be big-time players, we gotta make a big-time play," says Thomas' friend, committed party planner and budding eccentric Costa (Oliver Cooper). And do they ever. The neighbor shows up. The cops show up (twice). Miles Teller shows up in a party bus. The drug dealer shows up with a flamethrower. The dog's on a wire and there's ecstasy inside the stolen gnome. You want to know the drama? Where do we even begin?

TOO REAL? Forget the minutiae of how it goes down. This party is more than its logistics. It can't be measured in partygoers, in empty Solo cups, or in disturbing-the-peace decibels. This party transcends such metrics. It is an epic rager, a revel of truly mythic stature, and the stuff of legend (and also, to be quite honest, of nightmares). Don't let the found footage fool you. Project X is pure fantasy.

LEGIT-O-METER: 🎉