Holly-jolly holiday movie superlatives

We've been counting down the days until Christmas, and now that it's almost here, we've finally figured out the best of the best. Who is the absolute jolliest Santa? What is the all-time saddest Christmas ballad? And who across the entire yuletide cinematic tradition has the most wonderful life? Read on for the honorees in our Christmas superlatives.

The Grinch himself carved it, for crying out loud!

RUNNER UP: The Cratchit family's prize turkey

Honestly, we tried to avoid this. There's just no way around it. You can't even just listen to 30 seconds of the Love Actually score and deny that it is the most romantic movie Christmas ever, period.

Only a yuletide battle of the Bad Moms could result in a ice blue winter wonderland of such tacky grandeur.

RUNNERS-UP: All movie Whovilles

Nice try, Heat Miser, Snow Miser, whatever other Misers, but no one can compete with this squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner. Bah, humbug!

Just look at that dress!

No amount of drugs or lost phones or creepy encounters with a mysterious Christmas Michael Shannon should be enough to keep you from this party.

When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?

Miracle on 34th Street gave him a good run for his money, but Tim Allen's reluctant Kris Kringle takes top prize if only for being most improved.

Obviously.

Who can resist a snowman who hangs out among ice cream cakes and greets every person, on any day, with "happy birthday"?

RUNNER-UP: Sorry, Olaf.

Take that, Rudolph! Jack's ghostly stand-in for the red-nosed icon gets extra points for allover glow.

If only every December could be this March!

RUNNER UP: Ladies and gentlemen, the Haynes Sisters!

We mean this in terms of weather, wardrobe, and race!

It's not called Good Santa.

Stealing The Holiday's crown!

We triple-dog dare you to challenge this winner.

No subsequent version of this song has ever been quite so heartbreaking as the original in Judy Garland's velvety contralto.

Happy trails, everyone else.