TV Recaps: 14 Highlights from the Week Ending June 11, 2010

SYTYDC recap: All-star studded night
But I'm still not convinced that Ashley actually exists. Anyone see her? Notice her do anything? Or was she just being chased by Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Machine? Because I'm almost 100 percent sure now she's just a ghost. (Or just Mr. Jeevers in costume trying to scare away those meddlesome kids.) — Kate Ward

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Real Housewives of New York reunion recap: Only part one?!
Kelly, Kelly, Kelly, go back to your gummy bears. — Emily Exton

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Royal Pains recap: Royally Painless with Henry Winkler and Mary Lynn Rajskub
Seeing Mary Lynn Rajskub portraying a needy young woman who drove herself to physical and emotional extremes to keep her yoga-teacher boyfriend, I felt a little like I do when I see a member of the cast of The Wire pop up on a network-TV guest-spot — i.e., you had probably the best role of your career, and now you have to do this. — Ken Tucker

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Glee recap: Journey to the Center of the birth
To me, though, the first season finale, ''Journey,'' was just about perfect. Every essential plotline from the season reached a sense of closure (even the ones you might've wanted to forget: hello, Olivia Newton-John!) More than that, this was one of those high-energy episodes that narrowed its song focus (only four performances!) and found a just-right mix of cynicism and optimism, of banal reality and glam performance. Oh hell, I cried. How could you not? — Darren Franich

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The Bachelorette recap: Making connections
Roberto, never one to miss an opportunity to show his character, asked her to turn toward him halfway across, then kissed her for the first time. Mark my words: If he wins this thing, The Bachelor/Bachelorette will have proven one thing definitively. That is, if you make out with someone for the first time in a super-scary, dangling-high-above-the-ground scenario, you will fall for them. (See: Jake and Vienna.) And people say this is a useless show.  — Jennifer Armstrong

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Bethenny Getting Married? premiere recap: Mommy, daddy, and baby makes three
The Felix and Oscar dynamic was entertaining enough, however at times I found myself thinking ''Jason, why are you taking this from her?'' But then I realized she is pregnant, and pregnant ladies get a free pass, just like second semester seniors and Chinese gymnasts (thank you, Blair Waldorf). So if she wants to have icing for breakfast Jason, by Jesus let her have some! — Emily Exton

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Hell's Kitchen recap: The risotto always cooks thrice
I couldn't tell what Gordo was more disturbed by: her disobedience, her tears, or the fact that she took five minutes to poach two eggs. Since she only cooked the poached plate, he only tried that  one, and gave us the Gordo Angry Compliment of the Night: ''That's delicious! One Point! F--- off!'' — Darren Franich

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Justified season finale review: Did 'Bulletville' hit all its targets?
I'd be tempted to say that Justified has achieved a loamy richness to its portrayal of backwoods family life that takes on a complexity worthy of William Faulkner. That is, if I didn't know that Faulkner's sort of ornate storytelling is precisely the opposite of the kind of lean narrative-craft that Justified birther Elmore Leonard prides himself in avoiding. — Ken Tucker

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Real Housewives of New Jersey recap: Get a life
Instead there were scenes of Danielle alone in her kitchen with her trapped animals, willing her green phone to ring dammit while lamenting over the Manzo family's supposed obsession with her. With every episode, the woman grows ropier, more sinister, and ever more tedious. She's even exhausting poor Kim G., who was dying to trash the woman over pedicures. ''So there I'm sitting there at the Chateau, trying to enjoy a nice pedicure,'' says Jacqueline. Welcome to the world of Jersey nouveau riche, ya'll! — Karen Valby

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Persons Unknown recap: I always feel like (Somebody's watching me)
The eponymous group of unknown persons are being held captive for reasons that are unclear, by people whose motives are unknown; they are surveilled constantly, and forcibly kept within the confines of their not necessarily uncomfortable environs. All it needs is a giant weather balloon to police the perimeter. (Or maybe a koala in a party mask that shoots sleeping gas out of its eyes.) — Keith Staskiewicz

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Last Comic Standing recap: Good comics, bad format
Too bad the structure of the show doesn't seem to notice that stand-up is its own unique medium, though. The comics so far seemed solid, but man, the format of the show just sucks so much of the fun out. — Margaret Lyons

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The Good Guys premiere: Did you watch?
Pretty much everything Whitford says in his Yosemite-Sam-on-whiskeyroids twang sounds funny, though, whereas Colin Hanks' straight man role has thus far been surprisingly bland. Where's all the gravitas he displayed as the priest on Mad Men? — Darren Franich

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Two hours of Kate Plus 8: I watched them so you didn't have to
Fair point. Jolie's job earns her a paycheck for playing characters, whereas Kate earns hers being the same real person. But I'm glad I don't have to watch Jolie sobbing in the back of a limo that this rehearsal thing is just too, too much, or see her at home yelling at a daughter to ''Walk away!'' when the kid calls a sibling a ''cheater.'' (That Mady, she's in for a lifetime of psychoanalysis, I fear.) — Ken Tucker

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The Next Food Network Star: Who are you rooting for?
The episode's elimination challenge followed a similar cook-and-film template, as the chefs were asked to film 15-second promo spots for their dream series, then prepare part of a six-course ''California cuisine'' meal for the judges and tart-tongued guest Wolfgang Puck. (Sample critique of half-cooked beignets from soon-to-be-eliminated Alexis: ''My wife would divorce me if I gave her that to eat!'') — Michael Slezak

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