Olympics 2014: EW's Sochi Opening Ceremony Awards
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Best Total Miss
The Olympic ring on the far right just had to be a special snowflake.
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Best Near Miss
This momentary high five/double thumbs up confusion between Shaun White and a polar bear.
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Biggest Ralph Lauren Ad You've Ever Seen
Team USA! Some of the U.S. athletes referred to the festivities as the Opening Sweatermony.
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Tastiest Rainbow
Team Germany
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Most Enthusiastic
Antonio Pardo, 43, Venezuela's sole athlete in Sochi, is also its best skipper.
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Craziest Footwear Choice
Cayman Islands
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Olympic Stud of the Day/Best Mariachi Suit/Longest Name
Mexican skier Hubertus von Hohenlohe-Langenburg is 55 years old and competing in his sixth Olympics. He'll be wearing this outfit. He's also a pop singer and a prince. He's already won.
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Most Distinctive Flagbearer Costume
Kazakhstan
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Don't Hate Them Because They're Beautiful Even in Orange
Latvia
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Coolest Fashion Hats
Norway
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Fiercest Claudia Schiffer in Love, Actually lookalike
Alpine skier Tina Weirather
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Best Second Wind
Oh, now you wanna dance, now that Russia is about to come out.
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Most Compelling Reminder to Play CandyLand
Actual Russian architecture
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Best Guess at When She Broke her Arm
Our 11-year-old tour guide, Liza Temnikova, was injured as some point rehearsing for the ceremony. This scene?
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Best Moment in the War and Peace Ballet
It was the most dramatic wave we'll ever see.
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Most Revolutionary Mode of Transportation
This pizza bagel pogo ball seemed fun. (Runner-up: scurrying teapot.)
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Most Ominous
The avant-garde Russian Revolution segment set to ''Time, Forward!'' (Runner-up: Whatever music was played during the Olympic sport constellation star show.)
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Most Surprising
Hipster dance party
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Our Favorite Animal
The ''Dove of Peace'' performed to Swan Lake, which is apparently teeming with jellyfish.
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Saddest That NBC Didn't Include Them in Broadcast
Yulia Volkova and Lena Katina of t.A.T.u.
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Happiest That Miley Cyrus Wasn't Around
The animal kingdom
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Best Reason to Stay in Shape
Former pairs figure skater Irina Rodnina and hockey star Vladislav Tretiak, who've each won three Olympic gold medals, had a long way to jog to light the cauldron after inheriting the torch from medal-winning rhythmic gymnast Alina Kabayeva (who's allegedly romancing Russian President Vladimir Putin).