'DWTS': Sizing Up Season 18's Cast (By Their Portraits)
Disqualified: Derek Hough and Amy Purdy
Hey, wait, those aren't costumes! (They weren't able to make the official ABC photo shoot.)
11. Diana Nyad and Henry Byalikov
Snoozer pose. Gonna need some more flair, and maybe some fringe.
10. Emma Slater and Billy Dee Williams
Only one of them is exuding ''I woke up like this!'' ironically.
9. James Maslow and Peta Murgatroyd
''Help, I've fallen into another partnership with an attractive man no one really knows!''
8. Cody Simpson and Witney Carson
This should be the standard comes-with-the-frame photo for the rest of time. Are they siblings? Dating? Happy? Let the mystery unfold?. liiiiiive!
7. Cheryl Burke and Drew Carey
Excellent prop work. If cross-dressing is a new ballroom standard, they get a 10. ''Tehhhhhhhhhhhn!''
6. Sharna Burgess and Charlie White
Sharna is always solid gold, but the ice prancer needs to work on that bravado.
5. Tony Dovolani and NeNe Leakes
With a thigh slit up to there and a willingness to embrace her height, Ms. Thang's confidence sparkles next to Tony's godliness.
4. Karina Smirnoff and Sean Avery
''When Karina dips, you stand there'' is not how the song goes, but this pose works for them. Points off for his non-ballroom shoes, though.
3. Candace Cameron Bure and Mark Ballas
Looks like they're already sharing a leg, with a killer stiletto in the middle. I know I'd be scared. Clearly they're a major threat.
2. Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Meryl Davis
His smolder combined with her weightlessness already make them a technical threat. And let's not even get into their butts.
1. Danica McKellar and Valentin Chmerkovskiy
Winnie Cooper discovered pleather hot pants, Val looks like he has a sexy secret, and this balancing act is the most impressive by far. Three 10s!