'Bad Teacher' = 'School of Rock' + ?? It's EW Summer Movie Math!

If The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is the feel-bad movie of Christmas, Bad Teacher is the feel-bad-for-laughing movie of the summer. In this raunchfest with — unapologetically — no heart, we meet Elizabeth Halsey, a shallow, pathologically lazy teacher in one hell of a late-30s slump, who seems to have taken life lessons from a Ke$ha song. All you bad students out there, click forward to discover the formula for creating the most deliciously horrible teacher in recent movie history.

Cameron Diaz's Bad Teacher has already garnered comparisons to Billy Bob Thornton's Bad Santa. Though she's not quite the revolting mess of alcoholism we've all come to know and love from the dark 2003 anti-Hallmark fest, Thornton does deserve the nod for inspiring a foulmouthed narcissist who has no business being around children.

Equation so far: Bad Santa

Take that volatile substance-abuser out of a strip mall and put her in a classroom with a bunch of wide-eyed kids and you've got a demented version of School of Rock — minus the guitars.

Equation so far: Bad Santa x School of Rock

If you're waiting for a Superman figure to mold the minds of our youth, Liz is more like Kryptonite. Davis Guggenheim's poignant, earnest (two things Bad Teacher is proudly not) documentary pinpoints incompetent teachers as the primary obstacle to educational reform through a cartoon, reminiscent of Michael Moore, called ''The Dance of the Lemons.'' Liz is the bitterest lemon there is — but can she be made into lemonade? Maybe hard lemonade, with a hint of weed and Vicodin.

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'

Phyllis and break rooms. Need we say more?

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
The Office

The female version of fellow bad teacher Phil (Bradley Cooper), Liz also takes money from her students to get what she wants — only instead of an unforgettable Vegas bender, she wants a bigger rack.

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
(The Office x The Hangover)

Nothing says high self-esteem like suggestively splashing water on your bikini-clad bosom, right? Okay, Diaz is actually wearing Hazzard-style Daisy Dukes in her scene, but hey, she's a teacher, guys. Let's have some respect.

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
(The Office x The Hangover)
x
The House Bunny

The plot of the Farrelly brothers' 1998 farce revolves around Cameron Diaz as a kind, charismatic, philanthropic woman who just happens to attract men like flies to a carcass. This movie is pretty much the opposite: Diaz is shrewd, humorless, and left without a fiancé. Then she becomes a real bitch.

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
(The Office x The Hangover)
X
(The House Bunny - There's Something About Mary)

Sure, Liz is the teacher, but she's really a big kid thrown into a room full of actual kids...kind of like Billy Madison (Adam Sandler), a grown man who has to repeat primary school. There's a scene where Liz shows a glimmer of humanity toward an awkward kid during a field trip much in the same way that Billy did for his best third-grade pal Ernie. Remember ''You ain't cool, unless you pee your pants''? Expect a similar but sexier version of that. Plus a good helping of dodgeball.

Equation so far: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
(The Office x The Hangover)
X
(The House Bunny - There's Something About Mary)
+
Billy Madison

Bad Teacher is sort of the sister movie to Horrible Bosses this summer: misanthropic black comedies in which the awesomely bad behavior of over-the-top, corrupt authority figures is on display. Liz is kind of like all three Horrible Bosses — Psycho, Maneater, Tool — rolled into one. The difference: She's the one we're supposed to be rooting for.

And so our final equation is: (Bad Santa x School of Rock)/Waiting for 'Superman'
+
(The Office x The Hangover)
X
(The House Bunny - There's Something About Mary)
+
(Billy Madison x Horrible Bosses)
=
Bad Teacher

See more EW Summer Movie Math!