By Amy Ryan
Updated June 22, 2006 at 02:00 PM EDT

Over at E!, they go through red-carpet correspondents the way Spinal Tap goes through drummers, yet the network now wants to offer the gig to an amateur. They’re running a contest where anyone may submit an audition tape; the winner gets to cover the Emmys alongside Ryan Seacrest and will get to conduct at least one celebrity interview. (I’m guessing the subject will be Teri Hatcher, as Seacrest will probably want to sit that one out.) The gig is tougher than it sounds; not only do you have to not get star-struck by celebrities in all their finery, but you also have to display even less personality than Seacrest, lest you upstage him.

After all, E! hasn’t done so well with colorful carpet correspondents. Sure, Joan Rivers, Kathy Griffin, and Isaac Mizrahi were all hilarious and compelling, but their irreverence tended to embarrass the channel. An amateur, however, will be cheap, and if they say something inappropriate, they’ll be gone after one night anyway.
Still, we’d like to see to see a witty pro, in the mold of Griffin et. al., stroll the carpet and help make the pre-show coverage watchable.

I vote for Wanda Sykes. How about you?

addCredit(“Ryan Seacrest: Kevin Mazur/”)