'Use Purell, shower in Purell, rub Purell all over your body, sit in Purell, drink Purell...'

By Dan Snierson
Updated July 20, 2016 at 02:27 AM EDT
Credit: Frank Mai/HBO
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Silicon Valley is heading south to San Diego, where HBO’s tech comedy will plug into Comic-Con for the first time. But stars Thomas Middleditch, T.J. Miller, Kumail Nanjiani, Martin Starr, and Zach Woods are no strangers to the event. Here, the guys give you 10 tips to make it through the four-day fan fest.

1. “Drink water. More than you want to, what with all the lights and famous people and cleavage and other distractions. Drink it. And then pee it out later. After waiting in a very long line.” —Martin Starr

2. “Wear sunscreen and stay hydrated. Wait. It’s mainly inside a large conference hall. So I guess… remember to breathe and walk.” —Thomas Middleditch

3. “Wear a mask — and preferably a scary one — so that weird people stay away from you, and really weird people are drawn to you.” —T.J. Miller

4. “In order to ensure you don’t get the nerd flu, make sure to eat a Michael Phelps-level breakfast, drink plenty of OJ, use Purell, shower in Purell, rub Purell all over your body, sit in Purell, drink Purell. (This tip not brought to you by Purell.)” —Kumail Nanjiani

5. “Don’t get distracted by the local library. I know San Diego has a very serviceable public library, but don’t waste all your time there. Go to some of the panels and events. You can go to the library after Comic-Con is over, you silly little bookworm.” —Zach Woods

6. “Every person in a mask is a famous person. Sidle up to them, whisper “I know who you are,” and make them autograph your limited-edition Ninja Turtle lunchbox.” —Nanjiani

7. “Bring an extra pair of undies and a condom! You never know which superhero (or villain) you might go home with at the end of the night, and you don’t want a super-STD. Trust me. It’s not fun.” —Starr

8. “Make sure to only speak in quotes from your favorite TV shows and films. And if you’re cosplaying, for God’s sake don’t break character — people hate that. There’s nothing I hate more than someone who’s willing to sacrifice ease of conversation for social acceptance. Hang on, I think I’ve described a win-win.” —Middleditch

9. “Make sure the sexy cosplay person that you are talking to is gender-appropriate. Because I’ve had some Catwomen that turned out to be Catmen.” —Miller

10. “Raise your hands high over your head to appear larger and scream. This strategy helps to survive mountain-lion attacks and difficult emotional conversations. I assume it’ll work at Comic-Con too.” —Woods

To see how the SiliconValley stars fared in EW’s Comic-Con-themed Pop Culture Personality Test, click here.

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