Hilaria Baldwin and husband Alec reveal miscarriage at 4 months
Hilaria Baldwin has tragically suffered another miscarriage.
Baldwin, the wife of actor Alec Baldwin and the mother of four, shared the heartbreaking news on Monday, shortly after attending her 20-week scan with her doctors, and admitted that she was not expecting the sad outcome when she headed to her appointment earlier in the day.
The loss is especially devastating for Hilaria, 35, as she last suffered a miscarriage just seven months ago.
“We are very sad to share that today we learned that our baby passed away at 4 months. We also want you to know that even though we are not ok right now, we will be,” she wrote alongside a video of herself with her daughter Carmen, 6.
In the clip, a tearful Hilaria explains to Carmen that she doesn’t know how long it will be until the next baby comes, promising that she’ll “try really hard” to make a younger sibling happen one day.
“We are so lucky with our 4 healthy babies — and we will never lose sight of this. I told Carmen and took this so I could send it to Alec. I guess this is a good way to share it with you too,” she continued in the caption, referencing her husband and their other children, sons Romeo Alejandro David, 17 months, Leonardo Ángel Charles, 3, and Rafael Thomas, 4.
“I told her that this baby isn’t going to come after all…but we will try very hard to give her a little sister another time,” she went on. “I’m really devastated right now…I was not expecting this when I went to my scan today. I don’t know what else to say…I’m still in shock and don’t have this all quite clear. Please no paparazzi…that’s all I ask ❤️”
The couple had announced Hilaria’s latest pregnancy in September.
Prior to learning the devastating news, Hilaria had expressed her worries about the appointment on her Instagram Stories.
One of her posts featured a comment from a fan, who told her “Don’t let fear rob you of connecting to this baby.” In response, Hilaria said she appreciated and related to their words, writing, “I do think we need to be present for our grief and our fear.”
In another snap, the Mom Brain podcast co-host shared a mirror selfie and wrote alongside it, “Forget sleep, Nervous about scan later…”
Another video was taken as Hilaria was walking to her doctor’s scan.
The latest heartbreak follows a tough year for Hilaria and Alec, 61, who have been trying for a fifth child.
In April, just a week after revealing that she was “most likely experiencing a miscarriage”, Hilaria announced that she had lost her baby after the unborn child showed no signs of a heartbeat at its scan.
At the time, the Mom Brain podcast co-host said she was choosing to speak out about the loss in hopes of encouraging people to keep talking about struggles of conceiving that so many often face.
“I always promised myself that if I were to get pregnant again, I would share the news with you guys pretty early, even if that means suffering a public loss. I have always been so open with you all about my family, fitness, pregnancies … and I don’t want to keep this from you, just because it isn’t as positive and shiny as the rest,” she said.
Hilaria added, “I think it’s important to show the truth because my job is to help people by being real and open. Furthermore, I have no shame or embarrassment with this experience. I want to be a part of the effort to normalize miscarriage and remove the stigma from it.”
Despite being open about her journey to conceiving and her latest pregnancy news, Hilaria still received backlash from fans who questioned why she was sharing the news so early.
The mother of four was quick to defend her decision and explain her reasoning behind the choice by responding in part, “Me coming out and saying what is going on gets the news out there … then they move on to the next story. It’s been something I’ve learned over the past decade … this is one of the reasons I’m so active on social media. The news can take images for free from my page rather than paying a paparazzi to come follow me.”
Weeks later, she opened up to PEOPLE further about why she felt compelled to talk about her pregnancy early on.
“The one thing that’s been liberating is I told people my first trimester,” she said of her current pregnancy. “It was so stressful for me to have to keep it a secret on top of everything when you don’t feel well, and it’s like everyone is telling you to not say anything.”
“Then I realized that after having many children and having a miscarriage in the spring, this is my sixth pregnancy. Through having that, for me, there’s no reason to be quiet — absolutely no reason,” she continued. “If I lose the baby, then I don’t have to be ashamed of it. I can be open about it.”
“I announced my miscarriage as I was miscarrying, not after,” Hilaria recalled. “So I had already had that one as a preparation of doing something that is not typically done so publicly. This time, it was an opportunity of, ‘Hey, I can announce something as it’s happening, but it’s good news.’ “
“Obviously there’s no guarantee — you don’t know,” she added. “I’m not even out of my first trimester yet, but everything is looking really well and I’m just going to be positive about it. I’m not superstitious, I’m just going to be positive. Everybody was very positive about it. I think people love babies.”
This article originally appeared on People.com