By Lana, Maya & Zoe Soskin
March 25, 2016 at 03:39 PM EDT
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My daughters and I found this episode painful to watch. Not because it was boring or annoying, but because it was hard to see how the moms poo Brynn and what the end result is (or at least how it plays out on camera).

Per usual, they have a competition at the end of the show, with the twist is that there will be two trios this week — the catch is: there are seven girls! Maddie is the captain of one trio and Brynn is the captain of the other. If Brynns team wins, she will be an official member of the ALDC. If she loses, she’s back to being “unofficial” and by that they mean that Brynn doesn’t get to wear an ALDC jacket (that no one wears anyway). Maddie and Brynn pick their teams, leaving Nia out.

“That’s so mean!” My daughter Maya says — being an 8-year-old girl, she knows full what it feels like to be left out. “Why can’t Abby give her a solo?” Makes sense to me, but not on Dance Moms

On top of all this drama, Abby has added in a “web-mercial” for the ALDC, that she is filming with YouTube sensation Todrick Hall — which gives them only one day to rehearse the group dance! This, of course, sends the moms into a tizzy and they are psyched their daughters are in a commercial with Todrick!

Did I mention Kira is back? For some reason, none of the moms are happy about that, even though they bitched all season that she wasn’t there. While Melissa is out shopping with Abby for “web-mercial costumes,” head s—-stirrer Jess, attacks Kira, saying what a burden Kalani has been on Melissa for the past 12 weeks. (Poor Kalani! Having met her, I can say that she is one of the nicest girls.) This sends Kira into tears and she curses out Jess, calls her fat and throws a water bottle at her. All the moms walk away, including Ashlee, who they usually hate, but apparently, for these three minutes, they like her more then Kira. About two minutes later, they are asking Kira why she is crying as if the scene that just occurred never happened. Then everyone attacks Ashlee, because it’s been a solid six minutes since the last time they did. The moms are very upset that there is a possibility that poor, sweet, talented Brynn may really get on the ALDC team — officially. Ashlee attacks back, spewing such annoying nonsense, that my daughter startles me and screams “Shut up, Ashlee!” Yikes! Unfortunately, the hate everyone has for Ashlee is really ruining things for her daughter.

Then they attack Abby, with their usual lines of, “Where is she? She is never around!” I’m once again going to come to the defense of Abby, who at this point, looks like the ONLY rational adult. She is the voice of reason amidst a gaggle of relentless back stabbing moms and understands that it doesn’t matter what is best for the moms, but what is best for the girls.

Since the team spends all their time working on the web-mercial, they just make their group dance the web-mercial dance, which is weird because the song they dance to is the just a giant ad for the ALDC — with the constant refrain of “ALDC L.A.!” in the song. It’s actually painful to watch, because the dance is so bad (even with Maddie in it). My daughters and I cringe and can’t look at the TV. However, they still win first place, proving my theory from last week, that they win their group dances because of Abby and Maddie.

Now, on to the trios. Brynn, Kalani and McKenzie perform their dance flawlessly. However, Maddie, Kelani, and JoJo, have a major mess-up by not hitting their turns and everyone notices. Did Maddie do that on purpose to ensure Brynn’s win? That’s immediately what my daughters asked. “Mom! Did she do that on purpose? That was a simple turn for Maddie and no way she would mess that up!” Dance Moms Conspiracy theories at such a young age! Double Yikes!

In the end, Brynn’s team wins! We cheer at our house, while the moms go into attack-mode — AGAIN! Jill and Melissa accuse the competition of being rigged. Ashlee starts crying and tells Abby that they said that. Kendall tells Jill what Ashlee said about her and the moms go bananas. Jill and Melissa deny that they said the competition was rigged (even though they did), and Jill says “Brynn, you are a nice girl, but your mother is not a good person.” My daughter Maya tells me to write that down because she says it’s the first time Jill ever says anything nice about Brynn, even though it’s not really that nice.

This whole thing, causes poor Brynn, to leave the competition, dressed in her new ALDC jacket, hysterical crying, saying, “Mom. They said you were a horrible person.” It was heartbreaking. This poor kid, who just wants to dance and has been tortured all season by adults, is just a kid who loves her mom. No one seems to remember that. Shame on you, ladies. Shame on you!

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