Donald Trump made waves by refusing to attend Thursday night’s Republican presidential debate as part of his ongoing feud with Fox News. Considering that Trump is still the frontrunner of the Republican primary field and a consistent attention-grabber, this made for a strange debate. Stephen Colbert even declared on Thursday night’s The Late Show, “nobody tell me who won it, because I am not gonna watch.” To make up for it, Colbert created his own makeup debate, made solely of archival Trump footage.
Right off the bat, Colbert established the only rule for his Trump v. Trump debate: “You say the first thing that comes into your mind, and no matter what it is, your poll numbers go up.” Colbert went on to prove the bizarre truth of that statement by replaying totally contradictory Trump statements on the same topics. For instance, Colbert found two totally different statements on Republican opponent Ted Cruz from Trump in a Jan. 17 interview (“He’s a nasty guy, nobody in Congress likes him, nobody likes him anywhere once they get to know him”) and Dec. 11 (“I really do, I like Ted Cruz a lot”).
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“Right out of the gate, there’s a strong difference of opinion between our one candidate,” Colbert said.
Colbert went on to find opposing Trump lines about Iowa voters, Hillary Clinton, and most surprising of all, Fox News host Megyn Kelly, whose “biased” coverage was ostensibly the reason for Trump’s debate boycott.
“I could never beat you, that wouldn’t even be close,” Trump told Kelly in December 2011. “You have done a great job, by the way, and I mean it.”
Watch the clip below.