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Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker has a new memoir coming out that details his life in the band, armed robberies, and a tragic 2008 plane crash that left four people dead, and Barker with extensive injuries. In a new interview about the book, Can I Say , Barker also discusses his pill addiction.

“My breakfast was four blunts, four Vicodin, one Valium, one Oxycodone,” he told Billboard. “‘Cause that was the only way I could leave the house. I had to medicate myself before I could even think about getting in the car.”

When asked about his lowest point, Barker spoke about being on tour in Australia in 2004. “I was so addicted to Oxycodone, and I had a security that would actually sleep during the day and then stay up at night to make sure I was breathing. That was pretty pathetic. My bones were so brittle from so much painkiller use,” he said. “I had this moment when I got to Europe for that tour where I really identified myself as a dumpster. And I wasn’t proud. I was scared. I had to call [Blink-182 member] Mark [Hoppus] and say, ‘Hey, man. I’m like borderline suicidal. I’m going crazy. I need to go home.’ Like not even one show had started. I’d been there two days. I hadn’t slept one day.”

Barker has been clean for eight years, and released a solo single earlier this year. Featuring Ty Dolla $ign, Kid Ink, IamSu!, and Tyga, “100” was the first preview of Barker’s forthcoming solo LP.

Head to Billboard for more.