'I just used a shampoo designed to hydrate'

By Ray Rahman
March 09, 2015 at 06:51 PM EDT

When we spoke to the Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, and Akiva Schaffer of the Lonely Island, the guys gave us more than just oral-history annotations of their decade-old classic video “Lazy Sunday.” They also gave us access to some of the song’s lost verses. Look below to find four lines and exchanges that didn’t make it into the final product, in all their glory—plus an explanation for why the guys decided against them. 

Samberg and Parnell: We’re gonna hit this Chronic-WHAT?-cles of Narnia!

We’re going to the Chronic-WHAT?-cles of Narnia!

You know we love that Chronic-WHAT?-cles of Narnia!

Yo, pass that Chronic-WHAT?-cles of Narnia online purchase receipt

Samberg and Parnell: It’s loosely based on the story of Jesus, bitch!

Parnell: Yo, is that a new haircut? It looks great

Samberg: Naw, I just used a shampoo designed to hydrate

Parnell: Well, the styling’s very you

Samberg: You look nice too

Parnell: I’m loving your outfit

Samberg: J. Crew, brand new!

Samberg: Buc! Buc! Buc! Goes my mouth on these c-cakes

Parnell: My tummy grows bigger while the goodie bag deflates

Samberg: Yo, dunnie, stop the cab, we gots to unload

Parnell: For the Lion

Samberg: The Witch

Parnell: And plus the Wardrobe

So, why were these lyrics cut? “Because they just weren’t good enough!” Jorma Taccone jokes. “The one that I’m bummed that we couldn’t put in there is where it goes ‘Buc! Buc! Buc! Goes my mouth on those c-cakes,'” he continues. “Yeah, lost gem,” Samberg responds, with a laugh. 

Adds Akiva Schaffer: “I still like the idea that they would do something about their haircuts or the kinds of clothes they were wearing. J. Crew felt right-down-the-middle enough. But, you know, it just didn’t fit.”