By Mandi Bierly
September 15, 2014 at 03:43 PM EDT

Former Saturday Night Live costars Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig reunite to play suicidal estranged siblings in the new movie The Skeleton Twins—which is and isn’t a comedy, according to EW‘s favorable review. What is 100 percent pure comedy: Hader taking EW‘s Pop Culture Personality Test.

Watch the video and read the transcript below to hear about his first celebrity crush, his first line of dialogue in a high school production, how he could tell if a writer was new to SNL, and what music failed to impress girls when he was young.

EW: Who was your first celebrity crush?

Hader: First celebrity crush. It was probably Phoebe Cates in Gremlins. An older cousin was like, “There’s this movie called Fast Times at Ridgemont High where she gets naked.” We rented Fast Times at Ridgemont High, and it was so funny, it was a tape of that, and the minute that pool scene came on, it went [does noise] because so many people had watched it and rewound it so many times. It was like [repeats noise]. My mom and dad for some reason took me to go see the movie Bright Lights, Big City and it’s her doing, like, tons of cocaine and Michael J. Fox doing a lot of cocaine. So I was like, “It’s Alex P. Keaton and the girl from Gremlins who’s so cute, and they’re doing all these drugs…”

What’s the first line of dialogue that you remember?

Well, the first time I ever acted was in The Glass Menagerie in high school, and my first line was, “I didn’t know Shakespeare had a sister.” And I just remember repeating that line over and over and over again, because I was so nervous. “‘I didn’t know Shakespeare had a sister. I didn’t know Shakespeare had a sister.’ If I can get my first line right, it all falls into place. Just don’t mess up that first line.”

What’s your go-to karaoke song?

Oh, I can’t sing. If you watch SNL, any time there’s this thing with everyone singing, I’m like the one person who just has a straight line of dialogue because I can’t sing to save my life. You always knew when a new writer came in at SNL and they would have me singing. You would see everybody kinda look at each other, like, “Oh, they didn’t get the message that Bill can’t sing.” And I would kinda look up like, “Alright, I’ll give it a shot.”

What was your junior high jam?

My favorite song in junior high… My dad was a big Frank Zappa fan, so I remember listening to a lot of Frank Zappa. Girls do not like Frank Zappa. You can’t get a girl in a car and play Hot Rats and be like, “Willie the Pimp.” And they’re like, “Is there any music to this? Is there any lyrics?” And I’m like, “Oh, that’s a guy singing. His name’s Captain Beefheart.” And they’re like, “Can we put on TLC or something?”

Final Score: Musical Genius