July 28, 2014 at 05:54 PM EDT

You thought this guy was the King of Summer? Nope.

Clearly, only one man is truly awesome (and crazy) enough to trek across the ocean atop two great whites, nonchalantly tossing chum in the air as a hot mermaid hitches a ride by his side. That man’s name: Rob Lowe, erstwhile Parks and Rec star, once and future Lifetime luminary, and all-around swell guy. He isn’t appearing in any Discovery specials this year as part of the network’s annual Shark Week—but he is doing some splendidly ridiculous stuff in this exclusive promo.

Oh, you want to watch that over and over again in an endless loop? We’ve got you covered:

Shark Week 2014 begins Sunday, Aug. 10 on Discovery.

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