By Erin Strecker
Updated April 13, 2014 at 10:00 PM EDT
Art Streiber/TBS

It’s time for the biggest award show of the year!

Not really, of course. The MTV Movie Awards isn’t so much a legitimate award show as it is a way for stars to plug their big summer movies by trying to make a “viral” moment happen without any backlash. But, any award show that wants to give Channing Tatum a Trailblazer award can’t be all bad. Fingers crossed the inevitable look-back montage includes a little She’s The Man.

Tonight, make like the stars and imbibe a little during the ceremony. It can only make the unique combination of Conan O’Brien, Ice Cube, and Rihanna funnier.

Take one sip if:

-Zac Efron’s shirtless promise comes true

-There’s a Hunger Games reference

-Jennifer Lawrence’s face appears — via in person or in a movie clip

-There’s a joke about Oscar-free Leonardo DiCaprio

-The screams for Loki/Tom Hiddleston are deafening

-There’s a Game of Thrones reference!

Take two sips if:

-The camera cuts to a bored A-lister

-Conan makes any kind of reference to That Thing That Happened to Him in 2010/the fact that he may be way too good to host this thing

-The camera cuts to anyone not amused at a joke

-There’s any kind of YA dystopian joke

-Channing Tatum makes a self-deprecating joke

-A winner takes this thing way too seriously in an acceptance speech

-The camera cuts to a famous teen you don’t know. Congrats, you’re old!

Take three sips if:

-You see an outrageous outfit

-There’s a surprise appearance

-Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield are so charming you feel like your own life is a total failure

Finish your drink:

-When you feel like it. It’s the MTV Movie Awards; you do what you have to do. (Obviously, PopWatch encourages you to celebrate responsibly.)

The MTV Movie Awards air tonight at 9:00 p.m. ET. Kick things off properly by watching the MTV Movie Awards’ all-time greatest moment, below: