By Hillary Busis
Updated March 06, 2014 at 07:01 PM EST
Credit: Lester Cohen/WireImage

Long before the Great Aniston/Pitt/Jolie scandal of ’05 or the Less Great Stewart/Pattinson/Guy from Snow White and the Huntsman melee of ’12, Hollywood was home to the modern age’s most scintillating celebrity love triangle. It involved fresh-faced Disney stars Lindsay Lohan and Hilary Duff, both beautiful and talented and destined for great things… and, for whatever reason, both totally in love with Aaron Carter.

Aaron Carter! Sure, he could beat Shaq and throw the most slammin’ G-rated soirees this side of Mickey’s House of Mouse (“Then walked in/The girl I’m crushin’/And a kid spilled juice/On my Mom’s new cushion”), but it’s hard to believe that this little dweeb was truly charming enough to win over two of the biggest tween stars of the ’00s . He’s no Nick Carter, is what I’m saying.

Here’s the short version of what happened: In a 2006 interview, Aaron explained that he and Hilary started dating on his 13th birthday — which makes their anniversary December 7, 2000. (A day that will live in infamy!) What was their relationship like? “We kissed, and we hugged, and we’d hold hands, and go to the movies,” he said. “I was actually dating her for like a year and a half.” Enter a certain red-headed Parent Trapper: “Then I just got a little bored, so I went and I started getting to know Lindsay.” But Carter’s tangled web doesn’t end there: “And then I didn’t want to do that anymore, so I got back with Hilary. And then I ended up cheating on Hilary with her best friend.”

Yikes. Carter told Donny Deutsch that he didn’t know why he did what he did; Duff’s friend “wasn’t even that good looking, either.” (Dude, when you reach the bottom stop digging.) Hilary “really got her heart broken for me,” he said in conclusion. “I’m sorry for that.”

Turns out Carter is more than sorry. Earlier this year, the onetime teen idol made (tiny) waves with a pair of tweets sent the same day that Duff announced her split from her hockey-player husband Mike Comrie. Though Carter deleted the messages, they’ve been captured for posterity; the first reads “I can’t even think right now…..,” while the second says, “Ok I’m back to thinking normally again! Lol and no don’t ask I’m not telling you why I said I can’t think right now.” Mysterious!

The mystery was solved, however, when Carter retweeted a glamour shot of Duff on Wednesday, then followed it up with these tweets:

Aaron, oh Aaron, what are we going to do with you?

Duff hasn’t publicly responded to Carter’s moony tweets — though given her current attitude toward dwelling in the past, he might want to consider not holding his breath.

At least Aaron also has the teensiest bit of self-awareness.

You may, Aaron. You certainly may.