By Ariana Bacle
Updated February 25, 2014 at 05:21 PM EST
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Miley Cyrus really doesn’t want to play Tinker Bell. In fact, her lack of desire for the part is so strong that before sprinkling pixie dust around on a stage, she’d rather choke on her own famous tongue. Dramatic? Just a bit.

A tabloidrecentlypublished a blurb saying that the star is “going for her dream role” as “Tinker Bell in a live broadcast of Peter Pan,” NBC’s planned follow-up to 2013’s incredibly successful The Sound of Music Live. A “friend” of Miley elaborated to the magazine, saying, “With her short haircut, she does resemble Tinker Bell! She could nab this role.” Oh, so that’s how casting is decided. By haircuts.

Unfortunately, Cyrus as Tink is about as likely as Justin Bieber playing Captain Hook. First of all, the musical’s version of Tinker Bell is played by a tiny flashing light rather than an actual person. And secondly, the pop star herself has no intention of strapping on fairy wings anytime soon:

Case closed.

Peter Pan

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