Shia LaBeouf and Jerry O'Connell are #SORRY, and we have thoughts
First Shia LaBeouf was accused of plagiarizing his short film HowardCantour.com. Then he was accused of plagiarizing his apologies. Then he relentlessly tweeted the phrase “I AM NOT FAMOUS ANYMORE,” before showing up to the Nymphomaniac premiere wearing a tux and a paper bag on his head that included that same phrase. THEN he wore that same tux and paper bag for a recent art installation, where people waited in line to come face-to-face with the actor.
What more is there to say about LaBeouf’s bizarre 2014? A lot, actually. The latest twist in the LaBeouf saga is a possible Funny or Die response from Jerry O’Connell, and when news broke of the stunt, it set off a firestorm in the EW.com chat room. So get ready to be a fly on our Facebook Wall as we replay the conversation below:
Hillary: So L.A., are you going to Jerry O’Connell’s competing art exhibit?
Katie: Seriously, what is happening here?
Hillary: You tell us!
Lindsey: I want to know who owns that space.
Hillary: I hope it’s, like, Gaga.
Lindsey: That would be BEAUTIFUL.
Pamela: Re: Shia, I am strangely intrigued, but prolonged awkward eye contact freaks me out so I don’t understand why anyone would actually go.
Hillary: So they can write an article about it for the blog they work for. That is literally the only reason.
Pamela: Well, yeah, but like actual people, not journalists; they have to take one for the team.
Erin: It sounds like it’s 90% journalists.
Lanford: Is that ironic or by design? Like, “Leave me alone, journalists! But I’m going to make sure to keep doing crazy sh– so you have to continue seagull-trawling over me!”
Katie: I don’t want to give Shia any credit, but it’s probably by design.
Darren: I’m telling you guys, Shia LaBeouf did all of this to demonstrate the ridiculousness of blogs. You win, Shia! You win!
Hillary: Like we didn’t know already, though!
Darren: Well, he also thinks he’s the first guy to realize it.
Lanford: Even his ideas are plagiarism.
Darren: But Lanford, don’t you see: ALL IDEAS ARE PLAGIARISM.
Erin: Darren, are you starting a Shia Fan Club?
Darren: I am a semi-defender. Not a full defender.
Lanford: Darren also defends The Counselor.
Darren: He’s like the loudest guy in freshman year English. And lots of people defend The Counselor! [Googles]
Hillary: That’s it exactly — he’s that a–hole in philosophy who won’t just SHUT UP FOR ONE MINUTE. And even when he’s not talking, he’s smugging loudly at you.
Denise: Umm, someone should put this into a PopWatch post, a la Kristen Stewart. It’s been a long time.
Darren: And yet, he’s still more interesting than James Franco, who’s basically that same a–hole in senior year who is too smug to talk in class but always reminds everyone he’s doing a poetry slam at Open Mic night on Tuesdays. Conversely, Franco is a better actor.
Lanford: Franco is totally AP Liter-ah-cha and is always using that to bag freshman girls, and Shia is the kid who doesn’t apply himself, so he’s in remedial freshman English even though he is obbbbbbviously smarter than all of us.
Erin: Also, Franco is way hotter than Shia. Keeping it highbrow, guys.
Hillary: If by highbrow you mean eyebrows. Not sure where I’m going with this. BUT both of them have eyebrows, that’s for sure.
Erin: Is that a… TRU CONFESSION, Hillary?
Hillary: PAPARAZZI, PAPARAZZI. P.S. everyone:
Hillary: “Maybe there just isn’t enough wind.” If only Shia had listened!
Erin: OMG this video clip. Everyone else, watch this movie! (Don’t watch this movie)
Darren: Shia just needs to focus. Think about it. Now that he’s focusing on this apology thing, he’s overdelivering. Imagine if he focused this much on something worthwhile.
Lanford: He’s overdelivering and underdelivering all at once.
Erin: Like rapping in Holes?
Lanford: He never actually apologized! He has just set up installations and skywriting and press conferences about apologizing. He’s complex, y’all.
Denise: I’m just jumping in to say that I really liked Lawless.
Darren: To continue Lanford’s thing, he’s the kid in remedial freshman English who gets an F on everything but spends like two months working on the stupid video he has to make for Spanish class. Also, LaBeouf was the bomb in Disturbia.
Hillary: Ugh, and then you’re stuck doing a group project with him.
Samantha: I’m jumping in to agree about Lawless! Tom Hardy!
Denise: SO GOOD
Hillary: You two can start your own chat room.
Deven: What the hell is happening in here?
Denise: (I’m having like a completely separate conversation.)
Darren: WHAT IS REAL?!?!?! WHAT IS RECALL?!?!?!?! (I plagiarized that last comment from the Kristen Stewart conversation.)
Erin: You guys, I’m just over here listening to Frozen songs. It’s better over here. Shia wasn’t in that movie.
Katie: Speak now if you’re ashamed of any of this going on the internet, because it’s going on the internet.
Darren: Do it, Katie! People have to hear about Lawless!
Hillary: When do the memes collide, and J.Law goes to see Shia? Sneaks up on him, T-rex style?
Darren: And they both make Upset Ashley Wagner faces.
Lanford: He would punch her. No one wants that. And take a picture of her when she’s doubled over on the ground, laughing.
Samantha: And then Hiddleston shows up and punches Shia!
Darren: And the whole thing is shot in a single six-minute take!
Lanford: But then Jerry O’Connell could sweep in and deck him and save the day.
Hillary: Cut to heaven, where Shirley Temple and Sid Caesar stand, sadly shaking their heads.
Lanford: What if it’s Jerry O’Connell dressed like Tom Hiddleston?
Deven: Oh, I thought he’d jump off to an alternate dimension, Sliders style.
Darren: It’s an alternate dimension where all of humanity is just Tom Hiddleston and Benedict Cumberbatch rubbing each other’s cheeks.
Lanford: That place sounds creepy
Samantha: As Fassbender looks on, confused.
Darren: Confused and NAKED.
Lanford: And dancing like no one’s watching, because they’re not, for aforementioned Hiddles/Cumby reasons.
Hillary: I think once we reach the fanfiction portion of the conversation, it’s officially over.
Erin: …or just beginning.
Deven: Well, that’s my cue to leave